Inspiration
by Linnado Mikado
Summary: You inspire me. Whenever I watch you I feel enlightened. I feel free Don't you feel the same way? (A story with features of archery. It tells the tale of Mikan Sakura, a 3rd year at her school's Archery Club, and Natsume Hyuuga, the 1st year Ace with beckoning eyes and a personality with that of the Cheshire Cat. But is there more than what meets the eye?)
1. Chapter 1: Resigning

**Inspiration**

 _Italics_ are her thoughts, her thoughts don't always link with the subject of the conversation. On that note, read her thoughts and find out if they have double meanings (because most of them do).

Inspired by the manga 'Ichirei Shite, Kiss'.

* * *

We were bundled up together in that old room.

"And the winner of the Alice Academy High school Summer Tournament is..."

I felt intoxicated as the winner was read out.

"Natsume Hyuuga"! 

_So, he won again, huh?_

While I was 2nd to last place in the High school section.

As Summer came to an end, I, Mikan Sakura, realized how unfair life was.

* * *

It was hard, I admit - always being behind. As I raised my bow I thought about my life, _I'm in my last year of High school, what am I doing here?_

I aimed, and I fired.

 _Pang!_

The string bruised my arm as I let it go. _Damn,_ _that's gonna leave a mark._

I sighed as I went to pick up my arrow, maybe I should just leave. I dropped my head, as I let my thoughts overtake me.

"Sakura! Did you let the string bruise your arm again?"

A voice brought me back to reality, I snapped my head up and saw Mr. Jinno, the teacher of the Archery Club standing near the entrance. I gulped as I stood up, my arms hanging limply by my side.

I shivered, nervousness controlling my body.

 _I'm going to do it._

"Hey, sir" I croaked out, "I have something I need to tell you"

He stared at me, understanding glistening in his eyes as he ushered me into his office. 

_The arrow lay on the ground, forgotten._

* * *

Mr. Jinno sighed as he sat behind his desk, fatigue showing on his face.

I started fidgeting, was this the right decision? I knew that the club would still be the same no matter what I did but my thoughts always seem to hold me back. 

_The silence was killing me._

"I told you to be careful when you draw back the string" said Mr. Jinno, breaking the uncomfortable silence, "the mixed gender tournament is coming up soon. You are the head of the club Sakura so get your act together, okay?"

I raised my head up and looked at him square in the eyes. _I'm going to do it._

"Sir, about that..."

I gulped.

"I want to retire before the Autumn Tournament, it's time for me to be serious about my exams."

I shut my eyes tightly, trying to avoid looking at the expression he was making. 

_Disappointment._

Thoughts ran through my head, they were chasing me around like a nightmare refusing to leave a child.

"I'm sorry" I said, before I bowed and turned to leave.

Mr. Jinno spoke up, once again receiving my full attention. "That's right, the other 3rdyears retired in Spring. Good luck on your exams, Sakura".

I silently let out a thank you before turning to leave once more.

"Can you do me a favor Sakura, before I forget?"

I halted, signaling him to continue.

"Natsume Hyuuga"

That name made me tremble, _what about him?_

"He's going to be the new Captain; can you tell him about it?"

I swallowed my saliva and licked my lips nervously:

 _"_ _Sure"_

 _I'll try._


	2. Chapter 2: It's easy, isn't it?

_Ever since Junior High, during these 6 years, I've always, ALWAYS tried my best in regards of training for my archery._

 _But why? Why don't I ever get noticed?_

* * *

"Hey Mikan!" Shouted one of my Juniors, Aoi Hyuuga, the younger sister of the infamous Natsume Hyuuga; _she's_ _the complete opposite of her brother. "_ Have you already finished training?"

"Yes" I replied, "I'm not feeling too well", I managed to smile despite the hollow sound of my voice.

 _Please leave me alone._

"Really? Please take care of yourself, you've worked hard", she looked over her shoulder, "I better get back to training before Mr. Jinno shouts at me". She smiled sheepishly before collecting her bow and arrows. "See you later!" With that, she left me alone.

* * *

As I walked outside I felt blinded by the bright sun,

 _Summer_

I halted.

 _So tiresome_

 _However, I still haven't left anything memorable_

I chuckled to myself as I kept my eyes glued to the floor, _what should I do now?_

I carried on walking around the school campus, trying to implant every single detail into my brain. 

_My friends_

 _My life_

 _My hobbies_

 _My-_

"Sakura"

 _No._ I recognized that voice, _he's here._

"That's rare? Have you finished training?" He said in a teasing manner

I shivered when I heard his voice, I looked up at him.

 _What are you so happy about? Stop it._

"Ah, yeah" I replied, trying to avoid eye contact with him. "Natsume, have you just arrived? Morning training starts at seven thirty – you do know that, right?"

He smirked, "Why don't you wake me up? You are the Captain after all".

 _So, he's avoiding the question again, huh?_ I got irritated by him and his carefree attitude.

 _Don't let it get to you Mikan, stop._

"Natsume", I said, trying to sound strict but with my expression failing me, "you will be the Captain from now on".

And with that, I left.

* * *

 _How should I put it?_

 _It's so easy, for this to end_


	3. Chapter 3: Beautiful

I closed my eyes as the sunlight filled my face. _Beautiful. (1)_

This tranquility, as the open window blew a gentle wind onto my face.

 _I never want this to end._

* * *

"Mikan!" yelled a voice, making me snap my eyes open and face the source.

I saw them running up to my desk, the only two people I can confide in, Hotaru Imai and Koko Yome.

Hotaru, the stoic one, just stared at me, her amethyst eyes gleaming in the sunlight.

"I heard from Koko, so you've finally retired, huh? Took you long enough, idiot".

I just smiled, a small smile, _she has a weird way of being nice to me_. Koko slammed his hands on my desk, gaining the whole class's attention.

.

 _Don't look here._

 _._

"I heard it from Yuu, well done for your hard work!" he shouted while giving me a thumbs up.

I hugged him and whispered a thank you, trying to avoid looking at everyone's eyes as I did so.

Hotaru looked at me and sighed, she was quietly fanning herself as she frowned.

I noticed her discomfort, "what's wrong Hotaru?"

She sighed again as she sat down in her seat, next to mine. "It really knocks people's confidence you know", Koko stared at her before saying:

"PLEASE don't start going philosophical again, you know Mikan, the last time she -" He didn't get to finish his sentence before Hotaru slapped him with her fan. I chuckled seeing my best friends fight again, _moments like these will never get old._

"As I was saying" continued Hotaru, fixing her fan after she brutally slapped Koko, "having a guy like Hyuuga around really knocks your confidence, doesn't it?"

"Natsume Hyuuga?" Asked a feminine voice "that really hot 2nd year in the Archery club?"

"Hi Anna" I said, waving at my pink haired friend.

Koko saluted at her causing Hotaru to slap him again, Anna cringed at Koko's state.

"Anyways" said the disturbed girl, "I do like Natsume". Hotaru shook her head at her statement before taking a juice carton out of her blazer and stabbing the top of it with a straw.

"Well" said Hotaru, taking a sip of her juice as if choosing the right words, "I admit that he isn't ugly".

"He's not only handsome but he's smart too!" replied Anna, "the perfect guy", she gushed while holding her blushing face.

Koko stood up while holding my desk for support, _he seems to have recovered quite well._

"WITH A GUY THAT CAN DO EVERYHTING AROUND ME, MY EFFORTS ARE USELESS!" Shouted a distraught Koko.

"Not to mention that he got into the National Tournament without training much"

"THANK YOU HOTARU" yelled Koko, "HE'S SUCH A STUCK-UP CHILD, DON'T YOU AGREE MIKAN?"

I just stared out of the window at the birds flying above, _so free_ (2).

.

" _I guess so_ ".

* * *

 _Ring, you've got mail! You've got mail!_

 _Who could it be?_

I unlocked my phone and viewed my messages.

 _Natsume Hyuuga._

My stomach churned.

"Who is it Mikan?" asked Hotaru

I ignored her as I scanned through the message he sent me:

.

 _: It's Natsume_

 _Hi ex-Captain, it's me, Natsume. Hey, did you take a bowstring with you? If you have it then bring it back to the clubroom._

 _._

"Natsume Hyuuga?" asked a confused Koko while peering over my shoulder, "how'd he get your number?"

I stayed silent, even I was confused.

"Natsume!" Shouted Anna, she ran up to me, "what did he say?"

I showed her the message, "I never took any bowstrings, I've resigned".

Anna and Koko looked at each other with a perplexed expression across their faces.

"Well-" but Koko never got finish his sentence.

"Idiot" said Hotaru, gaining our attention, "so you didn't take a bowstring, huh?"

She dangled a bowstring in front of our faces.

.

 _How did it get there?_

* * *

 _NOTES:_

1\. When Mikan thinks " _beautiful"_ it's referring to the shade of red she sees when she closes her eyes. When you close your eyes while the sun is shining on you, you see either shades of red, orange or yellow. In Mikan's case she sees red, _the colour of Natsume's eyes._

2\. " _So free"_

Mikan's thinking about how Natsume seems to be so good at everything that he doesn't have to worry about anything.


	4. Chapter 4: Why?

_I said that I won't be coming back_

 _._

 _._

* * *

The leaves rustled as I walked through them, shades of red filling my vision.

.

.

 _So beautiful_

.

.

As the Archery club came into view I slowed down and peered through the door.

.

.

Pang, pang

Pang, pang

.

.

The sound of the arrows hitting the target sent waves of nostalgia throughout my body, I darted my eyes around the room.

I saw him.

Natsume Hyuuga was there, without a doubt, shooting bulls eyes without a sweat.

.

 _"_ _Having a guy like Hyuuga around really knocks your confidence, doesn't it?"_

 _._

Hotaru's words ring in my head.

.

 _I agree_

.

He noticed me as I walked in the room, adrenaline pumped through my blood as I stared into his crimson eyes.

"Sakura?"

.

 _Because_

.

"I brought you your bowstring" I said, slowly and carefully.

.

 _This person is just too perfect_

* * *

He took the bowstring from my hands, inspecting it carefully while his signature smirk played on his lips.

"This is the one, so you really did take it"

I bowed out of reflex, keeping my head low.

" _I'm sorry_ "

He looked at me, astonished by my behaviour. He reached out and patted me on the head like an old man might do to a child. "So, you're my Junior now?" He said teasingly, chuckling as he noticed me freeze.

I felt my cheeks redden as he said this, _what am I doing?_ I hurriedly raised my head, preparing to end this conversation.

.

 _My heart._

 _._

"Well, I'll be leaving now" I said quickly, turning on my heel and ready to leg it.

He grabbed me by the wrist, I winced for that's where _my swollen wrist_ is. (See chapter 1)

"Hey, why don't you stay here and shoot some targets with me? We can have a little session of our own". He smirked as he cornered me, _he knows that I can't fight him_.

I could feel his warm breath on the surface of my skin, raising hairs as soon as they touched.

"I'm fine" I said, stressing out the words, "My friends are waiting for- "

He tightened his hold on my wrist causing excruciating pain. "Stop it", I was surprised at how weak my voice sounded. _Why isn't he stopping?_ I was preparing to kick him when he spoke once more.

"It's easy to brush your hand against the string" he said in a cold tone, I looked back at him, his frosty crimson eyes sending chills down my spine. "After the Summer meeting you forcefully brought the weight of the bow up to 11kg"

I gaped at him, " _how did you know?"._ He just stared at me, bringing me closer to the wall with every breath he took.

.

.

"Are you an idiot?"

.

.

I froze as he continued.

" **So irresponsible** "

.

.

I gritted my teeth and spoke back, "why do I have to listen to a person who doesn't even train properly?".

I felt my fists shake as I said this, the fury making my mind go insane, I was not thinking straight when I pushed him off me and onto the floor.

"Don't act like you know everything, Hyuuga" I glared at him when I said this, venom dripping with every word I left the room quickly, never looking back.

.

.

 _Why are you like this?_

 _Why?_


	5. Chapter 5: Hand in hand

_What was I doing?_

 _._

 _._

 __I sighed as I leaned against the wall, I admit, he didn't totally deserve what I said but...

.

.

.

 _SNAP OUT OF IT MIKAN_

.

.

.

 _I'm so weak_ , letting my self-control drop like that, letting my thoughts gnaw me and let me become a mess of myself.

I stayed there, in my current position wondering what I should do next.

.

.

.

 _Should I apologise?_

.

.

.

I shook my head at that thought, _no way am I apologising, he's the one who started hurting me first._

.

.

.

"Sakura"

I turned around and saw him, his messy raven hair falling perfectly onto his face and his tantalizing crimson eyes looking determined as they bore holes into me.

.

.

.

 _What's he doing here?_

.

.

.

"Natsume" I said quietly, my heart beating fast as I stood up and walked closer to him. He just stood there, looking at me, calculating my every move.

"Sakura, look..." he finally said after a minute's worth of silence between us, "let's pretend that yesterday didn't happen, I let my mind take over me". He looked down, and I did the same. I gulped, _guess I should apologise as well._

"I, I guess that I'm sorry too. Even though you're the one who pushed me against the wall" I replied, giving him an accusing glare.

He chuckled as he looked into my eyes, "you guess, huh? Hey Sakura, care to help this Junior of yours?"

I stayed still as I stared at him.

.

.

 _What?_

.

.

.

.

"WHAT!?" yelled Koko, showing bewilderment as he did so,"THE NATSUME HYUUGA ASKED YOU, MIKAN SAKURA, TO HELP HIM!?"

I nodded, it all seemed surreal to me as well.

.

.

.

.

* * *

 **FLASHBACK**

"Sure?" I replied, after all, I didn't like holding grudges against people.

He smiled as he walked closer, closing the gap between us.

"Natsume?"

He buried his face into my hair and whispered into my ear:  
"I'm actually very worried right now, ever since the competition started everyone has looked at me differently."

I looked at him in suprise, _even Natsume gets worried?_

"Mikan, since you're going to quit I have no idea what to do, can you accompany me to the next meeting?"

"I-" I didn't even get a chance to finish my sentence.

" _Stay by my side_ "

* * *

.

.

.

.

He always seems to take my breath away.

"Well, it seems logical since Mikan was the old Captain, and he's just been given the role" said Anna, trying to calm down a deranged Koko.

"HOTARU, HELP ME OUT HERE. THIS IS CLEARLY NOT NORMAL, RIGHT?" Asked Koko, who was quickly losing his sanity, "I MEAN, WHAT CAN YOU TEACH HIM?"

Hotaru, being the most normal out of the 4, just carried on reading. "It's not as weird as you are, Koko".

Koko started going berserk while Anna tried to hold him down. "MIKAN, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO HELP HIM, OKAY? OUR EXAMS ARE COMING UP AND WE NEED TO PASS!"

I looked down onto my desk and sighed, why is this so difficult?

"Yeah" I replied, "I'll go reject him now".

.

.

.

 _I've been feeling like there's something wrong._

 _He was looking at me like that and he was using such a gentle voice with me._

 _My name sounds nice when he-_

.

 _._

.

"Mikan"

As soon as me and Koko opened the door we were introduced to Natsume standing outside the classroom, a frown fixed upon his face.

Koko pointed an accusing finger at him.

"IT'S YOU, NATSUME HYUUGA! Wait, did you just call her Mikan? IT'S SAKURA, SA-KU-RAAAA"

Natsume just ignored him and stared at me, I was mentally debating if I should calm Koko down or talk to Natsume.

I chose the latter of the two.

"Natsume" I said nervously, his name rolling off my tongue.

I seemed to grow nervous whenever he was near me, like I was an actress trying to impress a large crowd.

He smirked at me and pulled me along with hime – away from Koko.

"NATSUME HYUUGA, GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE" screamed Koko (not that Natsume paid any attention to him).

.

.

.

Then we ran, _hand in hand._


	6. Chapter 6: Sea blue

_Exciting._

 _._

 _._

.

We were running, _hand in hand_.

I blushed at the contact with his skin, _his hands are softer than mine._

Call me a creep but it was true, whenever I'm near him my thoughts seem to disappear.

"Natsume, where are we going? Where are you taking me? Why are-" He silenced me by covering my eyes with his hands.

"Be quiet, we're here". He brought me into the Archery clubroom where he disappeared into the male changing rooms, away from my sight. I sat down on a bench near the entrance and smiled to myself, letting nostalgia come to me. _Nothing's changed._

.

.

"Mikan, catch" said a cool voice, I turned around and got a sea blue coloured belt thrown at my face.

Natsume smirked at my misfortune, I glared at him as I picked up the belt and held it front of my face.

"Hey, it's SAKURA and what's this?"

Natsume sat down, put his hands on his face and continued to stare at me, if I was completely honest with myself I would've called him cute.

"It's..." He paused and looked straight into my eyes, "I want to use this belt to unify our team."

I stared at him, _who knew that Natsume could act like a Captain?_

I never thought of that when I was Captain, but then again, _I was never really a good Leader._

I looked up at the ceiling of the room and the walls, _when I was Captain I-_

.

.

"Mikan?" I snapped out of my daze to find Natsume sitting in front of me waving his hand in front of my face. I looked up at him and we stayed quiet for a moment before he spoke again, "want to try it out?"

"Huh?"

"The belt, want to try it out? To, you know..." He fidgeted in his place, looking everywhere but at me.

I looked at the belt that was in my hands and then back at him, "yeah, sure".

.

.

"NATSUME HYUUGA, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Me and Natsume were in the changing rooms where he was attempting to lift my top.

"Mikan, I'm helping you get changed. You're wearing a shirt underneath your uniform so it's fine, isn't it?" His eyes kept on looking at me while his hands were grasping my top, _this boy must really want a beating_.

"HYUUGA, OUT, OUT NOW AND DON'T TOUCH MY SKIRT!"

He smirked as he walked out of the room, leaving me to change in peace.

 _Troublesome._

.

.

"Hey, stop staring at me"

"Hm?"

Me and Natsume were standing in front of a mirror, looking at my reflection I could see how the belt stood out, and Natsume's troubled expression.

"Natsume, what's wrong?" I asked the boy who was currently kneeling on the floor next to me.

He looked up, giving me another chance to look at his tantalizing crimson eyes.

 _Beautiful._

"Nothing's wrong, I was just checking out the belt. It doesn't look bad."

.

Silence enveloped us again.

.

 _So awkward._

.

"Is it really too late to apply for the Autumn competition?" asked Natsume, making me look straight at him.

"It is" I said almost immediately, "that's what resigning means."

He looked at my belt and hugged me.

"Natsume? What's wrong?" Whenever he touches me, my face reddens, am I sick?  
"It's cold" replied Natsume, tightening his hold on me.

"Nat-"

"Mikan you're... Really stubborn"

I didn't even question his queer actions, or tell him to call me Sakura.

.

.

Moments like these, are moments that I wish _would last forever._

* * *

NOTE:

A guest asked how the belt unifies the group, it's like a school uniform whose purpose is to show which school a student belongs to - like a team. The belt is meant to show that the person wearing the belt is from Alice Academy, giving them an identity and belonging them to a team showing unity.


	7. Chapter 7: What's on his mind?

"Mikan, eat".

.

My lunch was just sitting in front of me, growing colder every second, but I just didn't feel hungry. My mind (and stomach) were somewhere else. I looked around and searched for them.

.

.

 _Crimson._

.

.

"Earth to Mikan Sakuraaaaa"

I snapped back to reality and saw everyone look at me, concern etched on their faces.

"Hey Mikan, what did you and Natsume do yesterday?" asked Anna, doing her best to bring up a conversation.

"Yeah" said Koko, joining in "what did you and Natsume do after the two of you ran away?"

At this point, even Hotaru showed her interest in this topic.

"They ran away?" asked Hotaru

"Yeah! Hand in hand as well" replied Koko, looking more enthusiastic than he was a few minutes ago.

Hotaru smirked and looked at me. _Gulp, she better not be planning anything strange._

"Yeah Mikan!" chimed Anna, "what happened yesterday?"

.

I breathed in and told them what happened:  
"We only discussed a bit about the belt colour for the uniforms"

"What? Is that it?" groaned Koko, "I expected something more interesting to happen since, you know, he dragged you away like that".

"So, you guys weren't practicing?" Asked Anna.

I shook my head while drinking my milk, _cold._

.

.

.

"That guy isn't likable at all" said Hotaru while biting into her melon bread, "isn't he just having his fun? It's obvious that he's better at archery than us and yet he keeps on worming his way into your life".

Hotaru stopped eating and looked into my eyes. "Do you know what he wants?"

.

 _"Do you know what he wants?"_

 _Do I?_

"If you have that much free-time" continued Hotaru, "then get your things back from the club and fix your mind". With that, the conversation ended with everyone approving of Hotaru's words.

 _I don't understand at all._

.

.

* * *

 _What's Natsume thinking about?_

I walked up to the clubroom to be introduced with a locked door.

 _Oh right, today is Saturday. Where are the keys?_

I walked to the Archery Club's conference room, walking along quickly to avoid meeting anyone.

 _I've always kept a distance from this place._

I turned the knob of the door open.

.

Thump.

.

I froze and turned the lights on, what was that sound?

.

"Mikan?"

.

I looked on the floor and saw a raven-haired boy with the most beautiful eyes that I've ever seen.

.

 _Beautiful._

.

"What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you the same thing, Natsume", I stared at him, noticing that he had a pile of documents with him. "What are those?" I asked, gesturing towards the documents.

"I was making the final adjustments for the competition tomorrow" as he said this I couldn't help but notice how his eyes turned brighter in the sunlight, making them shine like rubies.

.

 _Beautiful._

.

I unconsciously reached out to touch his soft raven hair, feeling the hair underneath my fingertips sent waves of tranquility throughout my body.

.

 _Beautiful._

.

"Mikan, what are you doing?"

I immediately stopped what I was doing and moved my arm away, _what_ _was_ _I doing?_

Natsume just stared at me, his eyes glistening in the sunlight. "Mikan, although I don't mind you touching me, I'm afraid that you've touched a sensitive place of mine" he said while tackling me to the floor.

It wasn't uncomfortable, it was _strange._ But it wasn't a bad strange, it was a good strange. Seeing Natsume Hyuuga right in front of me, within arm's reach raised a new feeling within me.

.

 _I never noticed_

.

"Mikan?"

.

 _How close he was to me_

.

"Mikan, are you alright?" asked Natsume, by this point he had gotten off me and was helping me up.

"Yeah, just a bit... dazed" I replied with a smile

 _Stop it._

.

He stayed silent, unnerved crimson eyes looking into my hazel ones.

.

"What's the charm in archery?"

"Huh?", It was a random, out of the blue question that he asked.

"What's the charm in archery?" he asked once again, holding my hands in his, entwining our fingers.

 _Stop it._

It was embarrassing, to say the least, the way he looked at me, the gentle voice that he uses when he's with me. It's all...

 _Wonderful._

.

"Let me think" I said while using my free hand to hold my temple, "I... I really like holding the bow and pulling the string" I smiled at a sudden memory flashing through my brain, "aiming and actually firing makes me feel satisfied and pleased with myself and-"

I stopped midway, noticing how intently Natsume was looking at me.

.

"I also like that feeling"

.

"Oh," I stopped talking and looked at him, "you too?"

"The feeling of slowly pulling the string... and the feeling of stretching your body as the tension increases... Makes you feel a slight...

.

 _Tingle"._

.

We stared into each other's eyes, hands entwined and an air of silence surrounding us.

 _I want this to last forever._

Then I remembered something:  
 _"If you have that much free-time, then get your things back from the club and fix your mind"_

 _That's why I'm here._

"Natsume Hyuuga, you must still be dazed from your sleep" I started stammering, "I, um, I'm here to borrow the keys to the girl's changing rooms, so, um..."

.

He looked at me, _annoyed?_ "Keys?" he asked, his eyebrows were furrowed together signalling his confusion.

I couldn't stand his eyes that were observing my every move, so I covered my face, "I won't need my bow or my protective gear anymore. It's time to take my belongings home".

I noticed how he stiffened as soon as I said the word "home", his bangs were covering his eyes as he stiffly left the room.

"I'll go get the keys, can you wait outside?"

I nodded in response and left the room, fanning my face to calm myself down.

.

.

.

 _Is he okay?_


	8. Chapter 8: Don't play with me

_Natsume, what's up with him?_

 _Talking about tingles while holding my hand_

 _It's-_

 _.  
_

 _._

"Mikan? What are you doing here?"

I turned around and saw Aoi Hyuuga looking at me while drinking juice.

I patted her head, "I'm waiting for Natsume".

She looked at me with pure confusion on her face, "my brother? Oh.." She said this with sudden realisation on her face. "You've come to ask him about the archery competition that's coming up, right? After all, you are the ace of the A squad, I'll cheer for you!". She made heart shape with her hands as she hugged me.

.

 _What?_

 _.  
_

"Aoi, who told you that?" I asked while shaking the poor girl.

"M, My brother of course, he's the captain after all and Mikan can you stop shaking me please? I'm spilling my-"

I rushed off leaving Aoi alone to find Natsume.

.

 _That jerk, what's wrong with him_

 _._

I knew that younger guys were cheeky, but I didn't know that they were this cheeky.

 _He's a new level of mischievous._

 _Keeping things from me…_

 _I've already resigned._

* * *

I ran into the clubroom like my life depended on it.

"FOUND YOU!" I tackled him onto the ground, anger shown on my face.

He had his eyes closed with his raven hair messed up.

.

 _Beautiful._

 _.  
_

But no matter what, the anger inside of me wouldn't calm down.

"What's wrong Mikan?"

I glared at him and pinned him down.

"What's wrong with you? Haven't I already resigned?"

He was silent for a moment before finally speaking again.

"So?"

.

I stared at him.

.

 _What?_

 _.  
_

"Why?"

.

 _What are you saying?_

 _.  
_

"Look, I SERIOUSLY PLANNED ON LEAVING".

He just looked away from me, boredom shown in his eyes as he watched a bird fly away.

A minute passed before he looked back at me:

"Tomorrow's the competition, please don't cause any more trouble".

I stared at him in disbelief, what's going on in his mind? Is it fun playing with me like this?

"I have already resigned" I shouted, while punching the ground beneath us, "Isn't YOU who keeps on causing trouble?"

.

 _Why?_

 _.  
_

"Why do you keep on recklessly doing things?" I asked, my voice breaking in the process, "don't mess with me anymore!"

 _Why are you always doing this?_

"STOP PLAYING WITH ME!"

.

 _Silence_

 _.  
_

We both stared at each other, both eyes were wide, both eyes were confused, both eyes were ferocious.

"When have I been playing with you?" asked the furious Natsume, switching our places in the process so now he was dominating me. He started laughing before saying in a tired voice, "aren't you the one playing with me?"

"Nat-"

I was cut off by a warm sensation on my mouth followed by teeth gnawing into my lips.

 _A kiss_

As I was pushed deeper into the Earth, the sensation grew and for a few minutes, it never stopped.

 _Crimson._

 _.  
_

* * *

 _.  
_

Once we stopped I was left wanting more, more of him, more of this feeling that's erupting in my chest.

 _More._

He got off me, but his tempting eyes were still boring holes into me.

"Mikan", he said in that raspy voice of his, "I never played with you".

"Why?" I asked as soon as I got my breath back, "why did you do that?", my voice sounded breathless and weak but I wanted, no, needed to know.

 _Don't confuse me._

He looked at me, his eyes gleaming once again.

.

" _You inspire me._

 _Whenever I watch you I feel enlightened._

 _I feel free._

 _Don't you feel the same way_?"

.

Then he smiled. _Mischievous_ , he seems to like playing with me.

* * *

NOTE:

 **No, this is not the end.**


	9. Chapter 9: Who did this?

_Everyday,_

 _It's eating me up_

* * *

He was standing there, in front of everyone, like a tasty snack that just needed to be eaten.

 _So close yet so far away_

"Regarding the arrangements for today's competition", he started off, raking his hand through his messy raven hair, "we have two groups."

Everyone clapped as he looked at us, I couldn't help but notice how tired he looked as he read out the teams, I couldn't help but pity him for I was in the same position as him, _if only I did my job as well as he did._

"Group A consists of Sakura, me and Kushiro. The lineup will be announced at around 10AM, after that you should get changed and prepare your bows." Kushiro smiled brightly as Natsume read his name out, everyone knew that he was a big fan of his; _he always scowled when I was Captain._

"Group B consists of Aoi, Yakama and Minu, they will attend the opening ceremony before getting changed. The rest of you will act as support. In the afternoon the people with the highest points will take part in a solo match". 

_Why?_

"People who wish to go home early can slack off" he added with a playful smile.

"Leader! You suck!" shouted Aoi, smiling goofily as she did so. Everyone laughed along and started cheering for Natsume, I just stood there, paralysed. 

_He's totally composed._

"Mikan?" 

_After what happened yesterday_

"MIKAN!"

"Huh?" I looked ahead and saw Aoi waving her hand in front of my face.

"Mikaaaannn? You totally zoned out, are you okay?" she examined my face as she said so, looking more worried by the second.

"I'm fine, Aoi" I stressed out, "I'm just nervous, that's all".

She tilted her head as she stared at my neck, "why is your neck red?"

"What?" I hurriedly asked for a mirror, as she gave me one I immediately opened it and gawked at my reflection. 

_When did he give me that?_

I grew more anxious than I was before, thoughts running through my head wondering when Natsume Hyuuga bit my neck. 

_That jerk._

"M-must've been the mosquitoes" I replied, nervously, trying to convince Aoi that her devil of a brother and the mark on my neck weren't connected, "there are a lot of bugs flying around, right?"

"Yeah", replied Aoi, scratching her head, "they're irritating, aren't they?"

I just nodded along, _she believes me._

"Sakura" 

_No._

I looked to my left and there he was, Natsume Hyuuga, walking towards me. 

_What does he want now?_

"Yo bro!" Shouted Aoi, waving her arms around, beckoning him to come near us, "what's it like being a failure of a leader?" she asked while punching him in the chest.

He ruffled her hair while looking at me, but I didn't let him speak.

"Aoi" I grabbed onto her, "let's go to the changing rooms".

She looked at me but was rendered speechless as I dragged her away from Natsume, who stood there dejectedly.

I was running along the corridor, dragging Aoi with me as I did so.

"Mikan", groaned a tired Aoi, "I'm tired, can we st- OW!"

I couldn't pay any attention to Aoi, or what misfortune had befallen on her, my mind was occupied with the bite on my neck.

 _Now that I think about,_

 _Yesterday…_

* * *

 **FLASHBACK**

I was still lying on the floor, trying to grasp what had just happened.

 _Natsume, what is he saying?  
Me? I inspire him?_

I laughed _  
Someone as great as him, couldn't possibly look up to me._

 _No way_

"Please come to the competition tomorrow" pleaded Natsume, caressing my face as he did so. "If you don't", he nipped my neck, "I don't know…"  
He kissed me, once again taking over my senses, filling them with _him.  
_

"What I'm capable of doing".

* * *

I stopped and crouched down, covering my face with my hand. 

_So that's how I got it._

"Mikan?" 

_How could he forget?_

"Mikan! Are you zoning out again?" 

_And act like nothing had happened_

"Mikan!?" Shouted Aoi, shaking my shoulders as she did so, "are you okay? You're trembling". She grabbed me by the arm and tried to pull me up, "we should go to Natsume and-"

I grabbed her as soon as she said "Natsume", I don't want to see him, _I don't want to hear his name._

"I'm fine, Aoi" I smiled as I pinched her cheeks. 

_How dare he say that I'm the one playing with him._

"You said that last time, are you su-"

"Aoi," I said, looking into her eyes that reminded me so much of him, "I'm fine". 

_When he's the one playing with me._

* * *

 _He said that I inspire him._

I looked over to where he was, laughing with the rest of our team, looking like he had no care in the world.

 _Doesn't look like it._

"Sakura".

I whipped my head around and saw Mr. Jinno moving towards me.

"You really did decide to come."

I bowed, "good morning sir", I really didn't want to tell him the real reason why I came back. 

_I gave in._

 _I gave into him._

 _It's too deep._

"I thought that it was impossible", he smiled at me as he put his hand on my shoulder, "who would have thought that after you left Natsume managed to convince you to come back".

I looked over to Natsume.

S _o free._

"I..." I trembled as I let the words come out of my mouth, "I certainly didn't expect it either".

 _Especially not in that way._

"You know", continued Mr. Jinno, "that was the first time I saw Natsume try so hard, and everyone knows that he normally doesn't bother to put some effort in whatever he does".

I looked at him, then Natsume. 

_You're lying._

* * *

"What's the meaning of this?" asked Koko as he bit into an apple, "I'm starting to feel like you don't even know what resigning means", he spat the seeds into the bin as he turned to face Anna.

"You look so cute!" squealed Anna as she squeezed me, "this is the first time that I've seen you in uniform".

"Yeah" replied Hotaru, taking pictures of me and Anna together, "I'm surprised that Hyuuga managed to convince you like this." 

I looked at Hotaru,

 _I gave in._

She looked back at me and nodded.

"I-" 

Koko intervened, "how did it turn into this?" He asked, exasperated, "didn't you say that you retired? RETIRED?" He pointed at my bow, "I can't believe you Mikan, honestly, I can't".

I sighed as I faced the 3 of them, "it's a long story".

"I can guess" answered Koko, pointing at my face, "you look as if you haven't slept in days".

Anna chuckled as Hotaru snatched a piece of paper from my grip, "what's this?"

"My timetable" I answered, "now give it back".  
Hotaru slurped her carton of milk, "you're the Vanguard this time?"

Anna grabbed the paper from Hotaru as she and Koko read through it, "eh?"

I took it back and scanned through it. 

_What?_

"Wasn't Natsume meant to be in the front line?" asked Anna, "so why have the two of you swapped places?"

I gripped my timetable, tearing it a little as I did, "it's true"

Koko peered at my face, "whoa Mikan, you look like a ghost!"

"Mikan?" asked Anna, "are you feeling o-".

"T-this is a mistake, I'm going to check with Natsume", I hurried off leaving them alone

"HEY!" shouted Koko, "WHAT'S A VANGUARD?"

Hotaru threw her finished milk carton in the bin.

"A vanguard", replied Hotaru, "is the first to start in the competition. Since the main mission of the vanguard is to get a bull's eye on the first shot, I can see why Mikan paled".

Anna stared at her, pity visible in her eyes, " I wonder who did this to Mikan".

Hotaru looked back at the Archery club's building, a small smile evident on her face.

"Who knows".


	10. Chapter 10: There's no escaping me

My face was flushed as I rushed through the crowd, pushing past people, my mind set on finding one person.

.

 _Where is he?_

 _._

"Ah, Mikan!"

I stopped running to be introduced to Aoi, looking relieved as she jogged up to me, her face sweating.

"Where were you? You just rushed off without me".

"I", I wanted to tell her about what Natsume had done, suddenly switching our positions to embarrass me in front of everyone. But the words never came out and I just stood there, dumbly staring at her.

Aoi looked at me, confusion stirring in her eyes as she wiped my forehead with a cloth, "I think you need to rest, Mikan" said Aoi, in a gentle voice like a mother might do to a child, "this competition has stressed you too much".

I looked thankfully at her, _she seems to understand, but why doesn't her brother._

 _._

 _He said that I inspire him,_

I looked back at the timetable getting scrunched up in my hands.

 _Doesn't look like it._

She followed my gaze to the timetable in my hands.

"Is something wrong Mikan?" She asked, concern lacing her voice, "is something wrong with the timetable?"

I felt my palms sweat as I tightened my hold on the paper, "Aoi, can I ask you something?" I asked, my voice trembling in the process.

I observed her reaction, she looked like she was expecting the worst.

"Yeah sure" she replied, trying her best to sound cheerful, "ask away".

"Is there a mistake in the lineup for today?"

.

Aoi gaped at me before sighing, her tense shoulders relaxing, "I thought something happened Mikan! Don't scare me like that", she playfully punched me on the shoulder before starting to speak again, "Natsume was the one who arranged the event, so you'll know if you ask him".

.

 _But I don't want to talk to him._

 _._

"In fact, there he is now!" She shouted as she pointed to the man that I wanted to see the least, "you can ask him now Mikan".

.

 _No!_

.

I felt myself clamming up as he came near us, heat radiating from is body as he loomed over me.

"Aoi", _I missed that deep voice of his,_ "go get prepared".

He glanced at me as he pushed his sister away from us, she opened her mouth to speak as if opposing his actions but he shut her up and pushed her away.

.

.

* * *

.

.

 _"_ _Now it's just the two of us"._

I shivered as he said this.

.

 _Get away from me._

 _._

An air of silence covered us, refusing to leave. I didn't dare to look at him, those eyes…

 _Why is he here?_

"Mikan", I felt him wrap an arm around my shoulder as he pulled me closer, using his free hand to hold the bridge of his nose as if he was pondering over something. "You've been avoiding me all morning".

I snapped my head up and glared at him, he did the same, we locked eyes for a minute – neither of us speaking, just lost in each other.

.

 _"_ _You've been avoiding me all morning"_

His words replayed in my head.

 _So, I'm the one avoiding you?_

I grabbed him by the collar

 _Aren't you doing the same thing?_

 _._

He grabbed my hand, loosening my hold.

"About the lineup", he whispered into my ear, tightening his hold on my waist in the process, "I'll be the center forward".

With that he let go of me and walked off, looking as if nothing happened.

I gritted my teeth, _why are you like this?_ My mind was confusing me, _what are you thinking about?_

.

 _Talk to me._

 _._

I walked up to him and grabbed his arm, resulting in me being pinned to the wall. His breath was hot and uneven. I looked around and saw his arms on either side of my head, trapping me so he was all that I could see.

.

 _"_ _There's no escaping me, Mikan."_

 _._

I didn't let his gaze faze me, I didn't let his words get to my brain as I rendered them pointless.

 _You inspire me._

I felt like laughing.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked he as he grew closer, " _this is no laughing matter_ ".

I opened my mouth to contradict him but he covered my mouth with his huge palms.

"To see your sexy back view", he smirked, "is my main motive".

He pulled away from me and walked off, disappearing behind the door.

.

 _._

 _._

 _What just happened?_


	11. Chapter 11: You don't understand

NOTE:

Some Mikan's thoughts here have double meanings :)

(See if you can find out what they mean)

* * *

I stood there in my place, thinking back to what Natsume said.

 _"_ _To see your sexy back view, is my main motive"_

 _._

 _._

 _Stop joking around._

* * *

I walked back to the main event, searching through the crowd for one specific person. Looking for those crimson eyes that look like rubies, gleaming whenever I see them.

.

 _Where are they?_

 _._

"Mikan!"

I turned around as soon as I heard that voice,

 _Found her._

"Mikan" said the exhausted Aoi, kneeling to catch her breath as her twinkling eyes looked at mine, "here's your arrow, you dropped it on the floor" she smiled shyly as she handed it back to me.

"Thanks" I replied, giving her a hug.

She looked up at me, "Mikan, what's bothering you?" She asked, tilting her head from side to side.

I was surprised, to say the least.

.

 _How did she-_

 _._

"You're too easy to figure out", she smiled before bouncing off into the crowd, chatting with the rest of the team, encouraging them to do their best.

.

I shook my head as I walked off to the bathrooms.

.

.

 _I'll never understand the Hyuuga siblings._

* * *

 _._

 _._

 _._

 _Some things are better left unknown._

 _._

 _._

 _._

* * *

I washed my face, the cold water from the tap dripping from my pale face while peering into the mirror.

 _I really do look like a ghost, no wonder Aoi asked if I was okay._

I sighed as I wiped my face with some toilet roll, I was in no mood to care about my face, _this day has already gone bad enough._

I stepped out into the desolate hallway, letting my mind overtake me as I did.

.

 _I'm in my last year of Highschool_

 _._

I leaned against the wall, staring out of the windows along the hallway.

.

 _What am I doing here?_

 _._

"Mikan"

I turned my head after hearing someone say my name, I clicked my tongue as soon as I saw him, the blood in my veins boiling as my mind went berserk.

 _Not him._

He stared at my face, looking as if he was observing my features. "Mikan, why are you here?" His eyes seemed to have frosted over as he kept on staring at my face, "you're the vanguard, you should out there getting bull's eyes on the first shot".

.

 _Annoying._

 _._

I gritted my teeth.

.

 _Did you think that I wanted to be the vanguard?  
_

 _._

I abruptly stood up and walked up to him, glaring hard into his eyes.

"What if I don't want to?" I stabbed a finger into his chest, "what if I don't want to be a vanguard?".

He stared at me, not intimidated at all.

.

" _For the vanguard to fail is a joke_ ".

.

I stiffened as he said this.

 _For the vanguard to fail is a joke._

 _Heh,_ _as if I'm not already a failure._

I felt the anger rising in my chest spread to the rest of my body, causing my body to shake all over – I felt like I could explode at any second.

.

.

* * *

.

.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked, my voice trembling, I felt so defeated, broken…

 _Confused._

A few days ago, he said that I was his inspiration, now he's forcing me to things I don't want to do.

 _Why are you so complicated?_

Then I remembered his motive:

 _"_ _To see your sexy back view", he smirked, "is my main motive"._

I chuckled darky as I stared at him.

"What was that?" I shouted, my face hot with anger, "you said that your motive was to see my back view."

The atmosphere thickened as we glared at each other, neither backing down.

.

 _Do it Mikan_

 _Do it_

 _Show him who's boss_

 _Show him that you're not weak_

 _._

I pushed him to the wall, my mind encouraging me to do something.

"Looking at me with that kind of view, forcefully kissing me while playing with my feelings", I felt my chest tighten as I looked at his face, void of any emotion, "THIS is how you show me that you appreciate me?".

I punched the wall beside his face, showing him that I was angry, I was livid, _I was…_

 _._

 _What am I doing?_

 _._

I tightened my fist as I let my arm drop to my side, my glassy eyes looking straight at his face as I tightened my lips.

.

" _Disgusting_ ".

.

I stepped away from him, maintaining eye contact as I did so.

"How can you think that this is right?"

.

 _How can you think that I like this?_

 _You don't even like me, do you?_

 _._

"Why do you completely overturn my feelings for you?" he asked, his eyes looking like they were staring deep into my soul.

"Huh?"

 _What feelings?_

"If that's all you want to talk about", he turned away from me, "then I'm leaving".

.

 _Did my words not affect him?_

 _Does he not understand how much he's making me suffer?  
My mind is occupied by him_

 _Yet…_

 _._

I looked at his back while he was leaving.

.

.

.

 _It's like talking to a brick wall._


	12. Chapter 12: Gone

_Today is my last match,_

 _And as the only third year in the whole team,_

 _I must pull myself together._

 _._

 _._

 _._

* * *

I trudged my way into the training room, slamming the door shut in the process.

The target lay in front of me, as if it was taunting me, saying that I couldn't do it – _I can't do it._

I raised my bow, feeling the blood pump in my ears, blocking out every single sound apart from my thoughts.

.

 _"_ _You should get a bull's eye on the first shot"_

My hands quivered.

" _For the vanguard to fail…_

 **PANG.**

 _Is a joke"._

 _._

 _SNAP_

 _._

I held the side of my face in agony as I dropped the bow.

 _Tch._

The clatter of the arrow as it fell on the floor caught the attention of everyone in the room, soon enough they all crowded around me to see what was going on.

"Mikan, are you alright?" asked a bystander.

 _._

 _Leave me alone._

 _._

"Having that kind of thing happen before the competition is a bad thing, isn't it?"

.

 _STOP IT._

 _._

I scrunched my face up and left the room, causing the crowd to start gossiping about me, how I wasn't in good shape for the event.

.

 _Just what am I supposed to do?_

* * *

 _(These 2 scenes aren't from Mikan's point of view anymore)_

 _._

Koko walked into the Archery Clubroom, dragging Anna with him.

"Hey!" shouted Anna

Koko covered her mouth with his palm, silencing her.

"SHHH!" whispered Koko, "if they find us then we're dead", he mimed someone cutting off his throat to get his message across, "DEAD".

Anna stared at him, skepticism written across her face. "Yeah…" Said Anna, unconvinced, "maybe you should just shut up or else we'll really be dead." She paused as she looked around "Hey, where's Hotar- WOAH!"

Koko pulled her near the competition hall, "OMG!" He squealed, similarly to what Anna does whenever she sees Natsume, "IT'S OKAMOTO AND RENSHI MIKADO!" He pointed at the two elderly men conversing over coffee as they sat on the stools near the judge's panel.

Anna squinted as she looked at the two men, trying to remember who they were. She looked back at Koko, "and they are…?"

Koko gaped at her in disbelief, holding his chest to add dramatic effect, "RENSHI AND OKAMOTO MIKADO ARE ONLY TWO" he put two of his fingers in front of Anna's face, "TWO OF THE BEST ARCHERS IN JAPAN!" He went through his bag and pulled out a magasine, "I ALWAYS read about them in the monthly magasine for archery". He gushed as he caressed the magasine before putting it back in his rucksack.

Anna looked at the men, widening her eyes in the process, "they're that amazing, huh? Are they going to decide the candidates for the solo match this afternoon?".

Koko shrugged, "they're just here to look at Japan's youth playing their favorite sport, I guess".

.

"They're here to decide candidates. If they can't decide then they'll have a shoot off …" said a masculine voice behind them.

Anna and Koko swiveled their heads, fear imprinted on their faces.

"During the Nationals there was a shoot off as well" continued the voice.

Koko took a step back before pointing a trembling finger at the young man.

"WOAH!" Yelled Koko, causing Anna to cover her face in embarrassment, "THE CURRENT CHAMPION FOR THE NATIONAL GAME, TSUBASA ANDOU!"

Anna uncovered her face to look at the young man, she gasped as she held her chest, "IT'S TSUBASA ANDOU!" She screeched causing both men to cover their ears. She fanned her hot face as she calmed herself down, "what brings you to Tokyo?"

Tsubasa raised a fist in the air, "OF COURSE I'M HERE TO SEE NATSUME HYUUGA!". He frowned as he looked at a picture of Natsume on the wall of the competition hall, "that boy" he added with a menacing voice, causing Anna and Koko to back away from him. "GAVE UP HALFWAY DURING THE NATIONALS, and guess what he said to me?"

Koko raised a hand while opening his mouth, "that h-"

Tsubasa didn't let him speak, "I don't need this kind of win" he said, mimicking Natsume's voice while waving his arms around. He kicked the wall as he looked at the two, "HOW DARE HE LOOK DOWN ON ME!" He huffed as he looked at the ceiling in agony, "WITHOUT KNOWING HIS TRUE SKILLS I CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON MY EXAMS AT ALL!"

Koko patted him on the back, "it can't be that bad, right?"

Anna nodded.

Tsubasa glared at the floor, "Natsume… NATSUME HYUUGA!"

.

.

.

* * *

 _PANG_

 _._

"Great hit Captain!" cheered Kushiro

Natsume looked at the target as he sat down to drink a bottle of water.

"I was a little impatient" he muttered, "was my posture a bit off?"

Kushiro shook his head, "I don't know, I didn't notice anything strange".

Natsume sighed as he walked over to the target to retrieve his arrow.

"Besides", continued Kushiro, "this competition is just for fun, it's not like anyone can compete with you Captain", he looked at Natsume with great admiration on his face, "you're the best archer on our team!"

.

The wind blew on Natsume's face, causing his bangs to cover his eyes.

"I'm trying my hardest" he paused, "today".

Kushiro looked up at Natsume, "what did say Captain?"

Natsume stared at Kushiro, a nonchalant expression pasted on his face, "nothing".

Kushiro scrunched up his nose but didn't say anything.

.

.

"NATSUME!" Cried a voice

Natsume snapped his head around, hearing the sense of panic in the voice.

"What's wrong Aoi?"

Aoi looked at Natsume, her eyes large and filled with fear.

"Mikan!" Shouted Aoi.

Natsume froze.

"She's missing!"

.

.

.

 _Some things are better left unknown._


	13. Chapter 13: Believe in me

From outside of the bathroom stall I trapped myself in I heard Natsume and a 1st year talk about the competition in the corridor:

"I'm so sorry Captain" cried the 1st year, her voice cracking in the process, "I'm the Vanguard yet I didn't get a bull's eye on the first hit".

"You have next year, so stop crying and calm yourself down", replied Natsume, the coldness in his voice not unnoticed, "it can't be helped since you're only in your first year".

.

 _Next year…_

 _I don't have a next year._

 _._

"YES SIR!" replied the 1st year, I heard hurried footsteps afterwards.

 _They're gone_

.

I clutched my uniform, wiping my tears as I tried to calm myself down.

 _What should I do?_

I felt my knees grow weaker as steamy tears slid down my cheeks.

 _I need to return._

.

* * *

.

"Hey!" Yelled a voice from outside the stall.

I jerked up and stayed still.

 _Don't find me._

 _Please._

 _._

"I saw the National champion Tsubasa Andou today!"

.

 _They're not talking to me_

I sat down on the closed toilet lid

 _I'm safe_

 _._

"He's REALLY cute, isn't he?" asked another, the excitement in her voice growing.

"Yeah, he is. The Captain is competing as well, did you know that?"

"REALLY?" she replied, I could hear her gasp, "we have to go and watch! COME ON!"

They ran out of the bathroom, leaving me alone.

.

 _Why…_

 _Why do I have to be in front of Natsume?_

 _This won't work, this won't work._

I shut my eyes tight.

 _I even got injured by my own arrow._

 _Embarrassing._

 _In this kind of condition,_

 _Can I…_

 _._

 _Even compete?_

 _._

I felt my heart beat quicker each time I thought about the competition.

 _In front of so many people._

Tears fell from my eyes.

 _People who support me._

My breath was uneven.

 _My Juniors…_

 _What if I fail?_

 _._

I sat in a fetal position as I clutched my chest.

 _._

 _FAILURE_

.

"Stop it" I croaked out, my voice weak as I grabbed my head.

.

.

* * *

.

.

"This place is going to be cleaned, is there anyone still inside?"

I hardened as I heard that voice.

 _No_

"No-one?" continued the voice as I heard footsteps come near my stall.

 _._

 _Stay away._

 _._

The footsteps stopped, I could see a shadow of a person from the gap underneath.

"Mikan? I know you're there."

 _Natsume._

.

"It's your turn soon" he continued, his words slowly registering in my head, "if you're unwell I have some medicine".

 _._

 _I can't…_

 _._

"Mikan…"

.

" _Please answer me_ ".

.

It was silent for a moment before he spoke again, I could hear his hands move along the stall door, "you better not go too far".

 _"_ _Why?"_ I managed to let out, my voice trembling, "YOU, out of YOUR own accord entered me in this competition. Did you at least consider my feelings?" My face grew hot as my vision grew blurry, "I don't understand you at all".

The other side was silent as I wiped my remaining tears.

"Vanguard or not" I continued, choosing my words carefully, "I can't do it". I let out a choking sound as the tears continued to fall, " _I have no confidence_ ".

.

 _I am…_

 _A loser_

 _._

I could hear him click his tongue as he tapped his foot, letting a sigh come out.

"But didn't you still turn up?" he asked, remaining calm. "You could've just ignored me and my unreasonable requests".

I shut my eyes.

 _Shut up._

 _._

 _._

"Frail and gentle", his voice was soft as he said this, as if talking to a child, "that's you".

I stayed silent, _was that a compliment or an insult?_

He paused, "I'm a useless Junior. I'm sorry Mikan".

I opened my eyes and stared at the door, my tears slowly drying up.

.

 _Did he just…_

 _Apologise?_

 _._

"Despite everything, Mikan, I still want you to take part in the competition. I wish to leave a memory of us together in your last game".

I wanted to hear more

 _More of his voice_

 _More of him_

 _More-_

.

I stood up and opened the door, introducing me to his beautiful face, _Natsume._

He looked into my glassy eyes, my reflection clear in those rubies.

He held my hands, _"I've been watching you, and you work harder than anyone else"._

 _._

 _._

 _"_ _Please believe in me"._


	14. Chapter 14: Nice

_"_ _Please believe in me"_

 _._

 _._

 _._

* * *

Natsume grabbed my hands and held them tight as we made our way to the waiting room near the competition hall, our team mates crowded around us as we entered.

"MIKAN!" Cried Aoi as she hugged me, "you're finally here!"

I smiled as I patted her head, she's like a little ray of sunshine.

She grinned as she looked up at me but her lips twisted into a pout as she noticed Natsume next to me.

"NATSUME!" She screamed, her crimson eyes glared up at him, "YOU'RE SO SLOW! WHAT WERE YOU DOING?"

Natsume just looked at her, tightening his hold on my hand in the process. I glanced at our entwined hands and looked away.

"Sakura was feeling anemic so I took her to the Nurse's room", he replied in a monotone voice.

Aoi touched my forehead, "so that's where you were", she took a step back and beamed, "glad you're alright".

Natsume pushed her to the side with his free hand and smirked, "she's fine, idiot, now get ready".

Aoi smacked him, "you don't need to tell me that", she ran off but turned back to shout at him, "IDIOT!"

.

Natsume faced me, and handed me a piece of paper.

"Mikan, here's your number tag".

I swiftly snatched the paper, earning a glare from Natsume, and studied at it.

.

 _2_

 _._

He must've seen my look of confusion as I inspected the paper, "I swapped our positions" he said, not looking at me as he did.

I raised an eyebrow at him, "what?"

He sighed as he pinched my nose, "you completely overturned my feelings back there", he turned around to leave, "but get this straight". He paused, "to me…"

His voice sounded quiet and weak, as if he was telling me a secret.

He faced me, giving me a chance to look at his stunning eyes.

 _"_ _This is love"._

 _._

 _._

* * *

.

.

 _Meanwhile, with Koko, Anna and Tsubasa_

 _._

Anna sat down in the audience's seat in the competition hall, she surveyed her surroundings as she turned to Koko, "why does it feel like the audience has increased?"

Koko took a sip of his coke, "I guess it's all the fangirls of Natsume", he covered his ears as a fan screamed out Natsume's name, "Jesus Christ, why is a lazy guy like him so popular?" He swiveled around to face the fan, "SHUT UP WILL YOU!?"

Tsubasa grabbed Koko's shoulder and made him face the front, he sighed as he held his temple, "you act worse than Natsume". Koko looked offended as he opened his mouth to contradict Tsubasa, "EXCUSE M-".

Anna grabbed his coke to silence him, "hush, you idiot! The contestants are here!"

The hall fell silent as the lights dimmed:  
"HELLO ALICE ACADEMY!" Yelled a loud, somewhat feminine voice, from the darkness

"Oh no" groaned Tsubasa as he leaned back, "here we go again".

"WELCOME TO THE 21ST ALICE ARCHERY COMPETITION HOSTED BY YOURS TRULY, NARUMI!"

Tsubasa clicked his tongue as he looked around for the announcer who was no-where to be seen, "this is why I don't come here" he muttered.

"WE HAVE GATHERED MULTIPLE SCHOOLS FROM AROUND THE COUNTRY TO FIND OUT WHICH SCHOOL HAS THE BEST ARCHERS" continued Narumi, "NOW GIVE IT UP FOR THE BEST SCHOOL IS THE NATION, ALICE ACADEMY!"

The crowd went wild as Natsume's name was heard buzzing throughout the hall. Tsubasa covered his ears as he cringed. Koko glanced at Anna who was simultaneously screaming Natsume's name along with the other girls, he gave her 'the look' as he returned to face the front.

.

 _Fangirls_

He thought as he took a sip of his coke

 _They're worse than Hota-_

He sat up and surveyed the hall.

 _Speaking of the witch, where is she?_

 _._

* * *

.

 _Back to Mikan_

"PLEASE WELCOME ALICE ACADMEY'S TEAM A, NATSUME, MIKAN AND KUSHIRO!"

I winced at how loud Mr. Narumi was, his voice alone sent vibrations throughout my bow.

 _._

 _What a loud teacher._

 _._

I took my place behind Natsume, the number 2 stuck onto my uniform.

 _This is the first time…_

Natsume raised his bow, preparing to shoot.

 _Looking at Natsume from such a close distance._

 _._

 _I know how he's better than everyone else,_

 _How he's so agile while holding the bow._

 _But why am I getting so nervous?_

 _._

He tightened the string as he pulled it back, his eyes focusing on the target.

 _The sound of…_

 _._

 **PANG**

.

Silence enveloped the hall as everyone leaned forwards, attempting to see the result of Natsume's shot.

"N..NICE SHOT!" Yelled Narumi, the tone of his voice showing how amazed he was by Natsume's ability, "IT'S A PERFECT BULL'S EYE!"

.

Everyone applauded, fangirls chanting Natsume's name as rivals from the other schools stood there, nervous as they looked at their opponent.

 _Amazing!_

.

"IT'S NOW MIKAN SAKURA'S TURN!"

I yelped as I heard my voice being called out in such a loud tone.

I breathed in as I raised my bow, adrenaline pumping through my blood.

.

 _It's stunning._

 _._

Natsume glanced at me as he moved out of the way.

.

 _His presence, it's…_

 _._

The sound of the string drawing back made the hall grow quiet as all eyes were on me.

.

 _No… more than him being here._

 _This feeling, how do I explain it?_

 _._

 _I need to focus but my heart won't calm down._

I released the pressure on the string, letting the arrow fly freely into the air.

 _This feeling…_

 _I can't control it._

 _._

 **PANG**

 **.**

I heard a round of applause as the arrow hit the target, I breathed out and wiped the sweat dripping from my forehead.

 _"_ _Nice"._ _  
_

 _._

 _I'm enchanted by Natsume._

* * *

NOTE:

Yeah, where is Hotaru?


	15. Chapter 15: The same old emotion

_He's simply...  
Wonderful._

* * *

We were half-way through the competition, everyone was waiting as the rival teams prepared for the next round.

 _It's the elimination, time to find out who's staying._

I sat nervously in my seat, swinging my legs back and forth as I tried to diminish the nervousness swirling around inside my stomach. My bow and arrows lay by me, my hands gripping onto them tightly as I waited for my results.  
"You're going to ruin your bow before the results even come out" said Natsume as he grabbed my bow out of my clutches, "I don't want my team looking like we couldn't afford new equipment".  
I apologised as I gestured for him to return my bow, he smirked as he lifted it above his head. I felt my patience slowly snapping as I forced a smile on my face, "Natsu-".

"You're amazing Captain Natsume!" cried a 1st year as she ran into the room, her group of friends closely following behind, "all of your hits were bull's eyes!" Her eyes sparkled with admiration as she stared into Natsume's eyes, his void of emotions. "Ah, Mikan", I replied with a 'hm' as I turned to look at her, "congratulations for making into our team's final 8 along with the Captain!"  
"What?"  
She nodded excitedly while holding my hands, "congrats Mikan!" I was lost for words as I felt a smile beginning to form on my face, _thank goodness._ I heaved a sigh of relief as I hugged her, not noticing how rigid my posture was.  
The door slammed open, the sound echoing throughout the room,"Natsume Hyuuga!" Shouted a stern voice behind me, I whipped my head around and saw Mr. Jinno, his arm leaning against the door frame. Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and fell into silence as they looked at Natsume, "prepare for the solo match this afternoon" and with that, he left.

Our team mates ran up to Natsume and patted him on the back, some even tried to lift him up. Of course Natsume didn't let them, instead he silently nodded as he _looked_ into my direction, a ghostly smile evident on his face.  
I felt myself shiver with both excitement and fear, having no idea why he was smiling at me when he just blatantly ignored everyone else.  
It appeared that no-one noticed Natsume's once-in-a-lifetime smile, or the fact that he was looking at me as he did it, instead they were all focused on Natsume's accomplishment, _like always._

 _Don't let it show, don't let it show._

I kept on silently chanting to myself as they all cheered him on, not noticing that I wasn't joining in or that I had left the room.

I walked out onto the desolate corridor, my face hot with mixed emotions running through me.  
"Mikan Sakura".  
The voice of an elderly man brought me out of my trance.  
"That was a really good performance you did up there Sakura, I was impressed".  
I smiled as remembered who he was, _Renshi Mikado, legendary archer._ I laughed in my head as I realised that this man was Koko's idol, _wait until I tell him about this.  
_ "Thank you Mr. Mikado", I bowed low, "thank you very much for your compliment, a compliment form a legend such as you means a lot to me".  
Mr. Mikado chuckled as he patted my head, "I am no legend Sakura, although I remember seeing you when you were taking part in this very competition back in your first year of High school. I was impressed then as well".

 _Ha! In your face Koko._

* * *

(Back to Koko and the gang)

Koko squished his cheeks together as he watched Natsume, "it's official" he said, smacking his lips together as he put his two hands in front of him, "I officially hate Natsume Hyuuga".  
Anna glared at him, "why can't this diva just shut up for once" she muttered under her breath as she observed her idol aiming for the target on the stage below.  
Tsubasa nodded along with Koko, "I agree Koko, I have to say that I agree with you", he folded his arms as he looked down on Natsume, "this is why he's my rival".

 _Rival, huh?_ Anna scoffed as she looked at the two boys to her right, _Natsume will beat them any day_.

"Speaking of Natsume" continued Tsubasa as he munched on a bag of crisps, "who's that girl behind him?"  
Koko scooted near him and leaned forwards to get a better view of the contestants below, "which girl?"  
Tsubasa turned to look at Koko and pushed him away, "ever heard of personal space Mr. Yome? AND DON'T EAT MY CRISPS!"  
"JESUS CHRIST CALM DOWN SATAN!" Screamed Koko  
"DUDE!" Yelled Tsubasa, snatching his Ready-Salted crisps back, "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU TO NOT EAT MY FO-"  
"SHUT UP WILL YOU" screeched Anna causing both boys to look at her with wide eyes, "luckily we're in a loud hall so no one apart from me can hear the two of you fighting over a dumb packet of cri-"  
"IT'S NOT DUMB" cried Tsubasa as he waved the bag of crisps in front of Anna's face, "THEY'RE THE ONLY THING LEFT AFTER SOME CRAZED NATSUME FANGIRLS BROKE THE ONLY VENDING MACHINE IN YOUR STUPID SCHOOL!"  
"EXCUSEZ MOI" shouted a mortified Koko as he brought an arm to his chest for added dramatic effect, "MY SCHOOL IS NOT STUPID, YOUR SCHOOL IS POORER THAN OURS!"  
"TAKE THAT BACK!" Shrieked Tsubas as he attempted to grab Koko's arm, spilling his crisps everywhere, "MY CRISPS!"

Anna held the bridge of her nose as she scrunched her face up, _where's Hotaru when you need her?_

* * *

(Back to Mikan)

 _Alright, I'll say it._

 __I looked in the mirror as I wrapped the belt around my waist.

 _My thoughts right now are..._

 __I sighed as I felt a heavy feeling in my chest.

 _Complicated._

"Natsume, can you answer your phone? It's ANNOYING THE HEAVENS OUT OF ME!" Complained Aoi as she pointed at his bag.  
"Oh really?" asked Natsume, smirking as he ignored the constant ringing of the phone.  
Aoi growled as she covered her ears and walked off, leaving an entertained Natsume behind.

 _Natsume..._

Natsume snickered as he unlocked his phone, muttering "annoying" under his breath as he leaned against the wall.  
 _Natsume, I have to tell him.  
_ I ran up to him as he raised the phone to his ear.  
"Natsu-"

"Yeah, I understand. I'll go over now".  
I froze as I heard him speak, _he sounds so worried.  
_ "Don't do anything stupid, Ru". 

_Ru? Who's that?_

Suddenly, I felt the same old emotion take over me again, but this time, it felt different.


	16. Chapter 16: What about me?

_What should I do, to_ _convey this heart wrenching feeling?_

* * *

"Ru? Yeah, I'll come later".

I felt my heart beat faster, like I've been constantly running on a treadmill. The burning sensation in my lungs intensified as I tried to breath normally.

 _Ru...  
Why does that name make me feel as if I've been punctured?_

He got off his phone and held it in his hands, a slight smile evident on his face as he looked down on it. My mouth felt dry as I choked out his name, "Natsume..."  
He raised an eyebrow as he looked at me, discreetly hiding his phone as he smirked at me. "Mikan? Are you okay? You look like you just saw a ghost", he grinned as he leaned against the wall, hiding his phone as he did.

I slightly shook my head as I breathed in, "Natsume", I let out as I felt a shiver go down my spine, "are you not coming to the party to celebrate our team getting into the finals?"  
The grin on his face vanished and was replaced with a frown, "sorry" he replied as he put both hands into his pockets, "something came up, could we reschedule it for tomorrow?"

 _Is "Ru" more important than us?_

I attempted to put on a smile as he zipped his jacket up, preparing to go outside. "Of course not" I responded, glued to my place as I watched him turn around to leave, "Natsume, our team has never gotten into the finals before, this is impor-"  
He cut me off, "I'll see you tomorrow then".

It felt like there was a weed growing inside my chest, it's roots gripping onto my lungs preventing me from breathing properly. I was strangled for air as I made the bold decision to chase him down to the lockers, slamming his locker door shut with my hand as I glared down at him. "What's so important about what you have to do?" I demanded an answer from him as his ruby eyes glared back at me annoyance evident on his face, "today is the party to celebrate us getting into the finals, the least you could do is attend like a-".

He cut me short as he continued to glare at me, "sorry" he stressed out as he pulled my hand off his locker door. "This is an urgent matter so the party can wait", he stood up and walked out of the building, "see you tomorrow".  
I reached out for him, longing for him to just answer my question.

 _Are you going to see "Ru"?  
Is that person really more important than us?_

I felt my eyes widen as the burning sensation in my chest intensified.

 _More... Important than me?_

* * *

"MIKAN!" Shouted a voice from behind, _Kushiro,_ "HAVE YOU SEEN NATSUME?"  
I spun around to face him as I gripped onto my chest, "yeah..." I replied, sounding crestfallen as I did, "he just left" _to solve his "urgent matter".  
_ "Ah Christ" he muttered, "I told him to wait as well, what an inconsiderate guy".  
He scratched his head as he paced around the locker room, swinging two bags around to calm his nerves.

I pointed to the black duffle bag with the initials "NH" sewn on in red, "is that..."  
He looked up at me, realisation shown on his face as he grinned like the Cheshire cat.

"CATCH!" He threw the bag at me, hitting me on the face, and ran off, "SORRY MIKAN BUT COULD YOU GIVE IT TO NATSUME? I HAVE TO GO TO TUTION!"  
All the words that I was going to say suddenly disappeared as I stared at the bag in my hands, _was he in such a rush that he forgot to carry his bag?  
_ My heart ached as I remembered how he just cut me off to see "Ru".

 _He couldn't have gone far._ _  
_

My grip on the bag's handle tightened.

 _I'll probably be able to catch up to him.  
I'm not keeping his bag, so by catching up to him I'll find out who "Ru" is._

I halted as I began to open the door.

 _No, that's stupid._

* * *

"Sorry I'm late!"  
I threw Natsume's bag in the corner of the room as I entered the party.

 _This is more important than him.  
Definitely._

"MIKAN!" Shouted Anna as she waved her arms in the air, "sit next to me!" She motioned at the empty space next to her as she drank her cup of Sprite.  
Koko smiled with glee as he stood up to hug me. "You worked hard Mikan, now it's time to get down with the cold boys" **NOTE: This means "It's time to drink some cold drinks".**

I laughed as I chugged down a can of Coke. I noticed Hotaru was sitting on the other side of Koko, drinking a glass of orange juice. "Hotaru? Where were you? I haven't seen you since the start of the competition" I asked my best friend as she stopped drinking to look at me.  
Koko threw his arms around Hotaru's shoulders pulling her closer to the table, "YEAH HOTARU, WHERE WERE YOU?"  
Anna nodded as she finished her Sprite, "WE NEED ANSWERS!" She yelled while simultaneously banging her hands against the table.

Hotaru sighed as she pulled Koko's arm away, "firstly Koko, don't touch me. You reek of mayonnaise, and I HATE mayonnaise". She swiftly moved away from Koko as she looked at her, offended, and stared at Anna. "Anna, don't bang your hands against the table, people will start getting the wrong idea from you shouting while banging". Anna immediately stopped and sheepishly smiled as she refilled her glass. Hotaru took her juice and stared at it while mixing it's contents around, "as for you, Mikan..." I looked at her eagerly as she smiled, "it's a secret".

 _Damn woman._

* * *

"OKAY EVERYONE, SHUT UP!" Yelled Koko as he clapped his hands together. The room fell silent as the attention was all on Koko who managed to stand up on the table, "since our guest of honour, cough, cough, Natusme, isn't here I'M taking the lead!"  
Groans were heard throughout the room as everyone rolled their eyes."You?" asked a 2nd year, "Koko, no disrespect, but you can't even control a 1st year let alone a whole entire team plus, you left the team in Spring".  
Koko gave him 'the look' and munched on a slice of pizza, "SINCE YOU'RE SO SMUG MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE THE LEA-".  
"Shut up Koko, and don't talk while you're eating" said Hotaru while holding her nose, "I'll be the leader". No-one even dared to oppose her.

Hotaru took Koko's place on the table and stared at us, "even though Hyuuga isn't here he helped the team get into the Finals. The results came in yesterday and you guys placed 3rd which is not as bad as I thought you would do since this team is full of idiots".

 _Geez, thanks Hotaru._

"So, for Hyuuga's win, you guys coming in 3rd and for Mikan's retirement as exams draw nearer.."  
"CHEERS!" Yelled everyone, and the party came into full swing.  
Koko was in the corner with some 1st years, doing... Who knows what. Anna was playing a round of 20 questions with some 2nd years and the rest of the 3rd years who left in Spring. Hotaru, well, she was... _How should I put it?_ Guarding her territory around the last plate of crabsticks.

I smiled at the sight of everyone together, that smile was then switched with a look full of worry...  
 _When will everyone be together again?  
Will I never experience a moment as blissful as this?_

I cringed at the thought, so occupied in imagining the worst that I didn't notice someone sneaking up to me.  
"BOO!"  
"WAAA!" I screamed out of reflex and saw a 2nd year looking at me like I had grown three heads. I smiled awkwardly after I made a fool of myself, causing her to laugh.  
"MIKAN!" She cried while holding her stomach as she laughed her socks off, "YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN YOUR FACE!"  
"HEY!" I shouted while puffing my cheeks out, "is this how you treat your elders? You might get wrinkles from laughing too much".  
She grinned at me while handing me a card, I opened it and saw a pleasant amount of heartfelt messages all telling me to do try my hardest in my exams.  
"You worked hard in your year as Captain, so here's a little something from everyone!"

I looked around the card for one particular message.

 _I found Aoi's but where's...  
_

"Hey, why is there a blank space?", the girl looked at me, then the space.  
"Ah..." she made a thoughtful face as she stared back at me, "that's meant for Natsume but since we haven't seen him, we couldn't get him to fill it in".

 _Just where is he?  
Is he still with "Ru"?_

 _Just_ _who_ _is_ _"Ru"?_

* * *

NOTE:  
This chapter was BY FAR the hardest to write.  
I think my head is about to explode.


	17. Chapter 17: Confusion

The party went on as I isolated myself on a seat beside the wall, holding the card in front of me. My eyes closed as my mind was in turmoil, continuous thoughts passed through my head as I bit my lips, confusion stirring through me.

 _This card keeps on bothering me._

My foot continuously tapped on the ground as I read through the card once more, trying to soak up all the warm words and well-wishes that everyone wrote down.

 _But..._

"ARGH!" I screamed in anguish as my arms flopped to my side and leaned back so I was facing the ceiling.

 _WHY DOES THAT BLANK SPACE KEEP ON BOTHERING ME?_

* * *

 _(Not in Mikan's POV)_

Tsubasa ran up to the party venue, his uniform in disarray as his soaked hair flopped against his face with each step he took.

 _Why did it have to rain? Now my uniform looks worse than it did before I came here._ He inhaled the cold air of the night as he stared at the door, _why did I wear my uniform again?_

He crouched down and buried his head in his arms, a black cloud looming over his head as the rain continued to pour down on him.

 _Ah shoot, it looks like I've peed myself._

A sigh was heard from the 17 year old as he picked on his blazer and sorted out his trousers, frustration evident on his face as he tried to retie his tie but was having a hard time doing so as the cold made his fingers feel numb. Soon enough he gave up and ended up sitting against the wall, conflicted whether or not he should go inside.

"It feels like my clothes are carrying bags full of rocks", he rested his chin on his knee as he watched the rain get heavier, the petrichor emanating from the ground soothing his mind as he leaned back.

"Why did I even come to this stupid party?" he asked no-one in particular, he got no answer. "Oh yeah, because Koko invited me saying that I should 'communicate with the students from his school to learn more about the way of the Alices'", he mimicked Koko's voice as he stood up. "Can't believe I actually came in the first place, I mean, I'm not even from Alice Academy and yet I'm going to a party where I only know, what, 3 people", he counted three people on his fingers but quickly changed it to two.

 _I don't think Natsume counts, I hate him._

"So I only know two people, huh..."He paused for a moment, registering the words into his head, "wow, that's sad."

 _But it will be three soon, I just have to talk to her._

He glanced at the door, determination filled in his eyes as he marched towards it.

 _By the end of the day, I have to get her to notice me._

* * *

 _(Still in Tusbasa's POV)_

I stumbled through the door, a little bit uncomfortable from the cold water seeping onto my skin but I didn't let that bother me, I was on a mission and I needed to accomplish it by the end of the party.

 _I feel like the Asian version of James Bond, just gotta fix my attire and all's well._

"YO! IT'S SATAN!"

I clicked my tongue as I turned around, _geh, it's Mr. Steal-yo-food,_ I still don't get why he calls me Satan.  
"Yo" I replied back, raising an arm since waving my arm is overrated, "how are you little Imp?"

I saw his smile crack a bit as he slapped my back, "right back at you Mr. From-a-poor-school, how are you? I wasn't really expecting you to come".  
"Just peachy" I replied, giving him my James Bond smile, "by the way, nice, uh, party you have here. Did you organise it?"  
Koko grinned as he took a sip of his lemonade, "nah, I think it's either Natsume's or Mikan's. Wish it was mine though, I would've added streamers everywhere and some cooler music, but, fate's like that".

 _I can't imagine Natsume throwing a party, all he knows is how to be an evil kid._

"So..." I picked up a glass of water and sipped it as I thought of what I was going to say, great minds only work when they're hydrated, "is Natsume here?"  
Koko shrugged, "don't think so, haven't seen him or his little sister all day. I think they vanished off the face of the Earth, you know, like in those sci-fi movies".  
I just nodded along, my eyes surveying the room, not really paying attention to Koko's rambling.

 _Found my target._

"And it's really cool 'cause- HEY! SATAN! EARTH TO TSUBASA ANDOU! You look like you're in euphoria, are you really drinking water? Can I take a- HEY!"  
I ran off leaving a fuming Koko behind, but I didn't care for I had a mission to complete.

 _Sorry Yome, I have something more important to do._

* * *

 _(Tsubasa's point of view part 3)_ **NOTE: He's probably one of my favourite characters**

I spotted her sitting alone in the corner, no Anna, no Koko, just her and, uh, a card? **NOTE: Tsubasa hasn't met Hotaru yet so he doesn't know who she is  
** There were a lot of people in my way so hey, you can't blame me for not knowing what she was holding.

She's so mesmerising, heck, even when she was standing behind my most hated rival (cough, cough, Natsume) she was still enchanting. _And now, when she looks like the world is going to end with her eyebrows furrowed together, she's still the most beautiful being in the world._

 _But... Her name, her name._

She's never introduced herself to me so I was stumped. _Damn, this is starting to sound like a really cliché drama where the main character experiences love at first sight but he doesn't even know her name._

Thank god Koko came in:  
"Hey Tsubasa, why did you run off? OH, WOW, WHY are you staring at MIKAN SAKURA, my best friend may I add?" He raised an eyebrow as he drew in on my face, allowing me to smell the lemonade from his mouth. _That's some strong lemonade._

"She's your best friend?" _Really Koko? 'Cause she seems more talented than you.  
_ He nodded, "so, why are you staring at her? You know, I'm starting to doubt that what you just drank was water."

I ignored his remark as I moved past the crowd to go up to her.

 _Mikan Sakura, Tsubasa Andou is about to smash into your life. Wait, no, that sounds weird. Never mind.  
_

* * *

 _(Tsubasa's POV part 4)  
_

I skilfully slid next to her, but I guess she didn't notice me because all her attention was on that card.

 _It's sad to know that a piece of paper captivates her more than me, a living and breathing human being._

 _Alright Tsubasa Andou, don't stammer._

"H-Hey?" I immediately shut up as I heard my voice, _GODAMMIT I'M STUTTERING._

 _There goes my once in a lifetime chance of impressing the one I love.  
No, I need to look on the bright side, she'll see how nervous I sound which will... ANYWAYS, COME ON TSUBASA ANDOU!  
_

"So... Y-you were really great up there, uh, you know? Oh, I'm Tsubasa Andou, I, uh..." My cheeks went hot as my heart started sounding like an echo, beating louder and stronger each time.

 _Come on Tsuabsa, don't back out now._

"I got first place in this year's Interhigh Archery Competition, but you, um, you already knew that, right? Since you're, you know, into archery and stuff" _and holy hotdogs, I sound like a highly intellectual baby who has just started to talk._

"Um... Oh right, you're also third year, right? Funny, 'cause, you know, I'm a third year as well."

I glanced at her and what do you know, _she's not looking at me at all.  
It's okay me, calm down and go in for the kill, she's probably too shy to look at me._

"Well, actually, I, um..." _COME ON ME, YOU CAN DO IT! "_ I was thinking that it might be a good idea to exchange emails because, you know, since we're in the same year we can, h-help each other out during the University entry exams and stuff like that".

 _Holy chipsus, why is she quiet?_

I looked to my right and saw her hands trembling as she held onto the card, tears threatening to come out from her hazel eyes.

 _CHRIST, NO, DON'T CRY, I TAKE IT BACK! I TAKE EVERYTHING BACK!_

 _Oh man...  
Lady Strawberries, I seriously messed up._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

I heard a shuffle next to me but I didn't care, my concentration was absorbed on that blank space.

 _I'm probably like that to him.  
Just a blank canvas that he thinks he can mess around with.  
A plain spot surrounded by many colourful beings.  
Just... Boring._

Tears started to come out and drip onto the card, smudging the ink used to write everyone's messages.

"Hotaru..." I choked out, my body convulsing as I was bombarded with various emotions, too many for my weak body to handle. "Hotaru... I should've gone after him." The tears fell everywhere, like a mini river swallowing everything up as they fell down my face.

 _This is all my fault.  
I want to ask him properly.  
Ask him about..._

"T-THIS HAS MY EMAIL ON IT!" I turned around and came face to face with a blue haired boy who was, _blushing?_  
 _Who on earth is he?_

"BYE!" He left as soon as he handed me a piece of paper:

 _This is my email, TsubasaA567 ._

I gaped at the paper in my hands...

 _What just happened?_


	18. Chapter 18: It's time to find out

_I want to talk to Natsume..._

* * *

That blue-haired guy sitting next to me scurried off, hiding his flushing face behind his hands. I stared at the note he gave me, squinting so I could read his handwriting.

 _His handwriting isn't very legible..._

A frown was fixed on my face as I read the rushed lines of writing scribbled in biro, apart from the his email address ( _only God knows why someone like me received some stranger's email address)_ there was a little sentence at the bottom. Sadly, it was too small and slanted to read.

 _I should've asked him for his name.  
Oh, and why he gave me his email address._

"Hey, Sakura"  
I waved a hand at Mr. Jinno as he approached me, a cup of wine in one hand and his phone in another, "you got a letter from Alice University, stop by the staff room tomorrow morning". I nodded as he went off, stopping by the drinks stand to refill his glass.

Sighing, I rested my chin on my hands, my eyes staring into the crowd as my mind drifted off.

 _When will I be able to talk properly?_

* * *

"Alright, fill out that form and bring in tomorrow" said Mr. Narumi, he looked pleased as he handed me the form,"Alice University is a strong school for archery and since you got a good result in the competition, Headmaster Yukihara thought that you would make an excellent student. Plus, we're partner schools so don't worry about not getting a place" he winked and gave me a thumbs up.

 _What a strange teacher._

"Thank you" I appreciated the compliment but... _I'm honestly not that good._

"Well then", Mr. Narumi sighed as he patted me on the shoulder, "want to supervise morning practise with me in the afternoon? Since Mr. Jinno isn't here". I raised my head, a slight smile showing on my face.

"Yes, I'll come along".

* * *

 _We won't have any more opportunities to meet..._

The sunlit hallways made my eyes ache as the rays shone down on my face. I covered the light with my hands as the shadows of all the students danced on the walls.

 _My eyes feel droopy.  
If it's like this then.._

I continued to walk along the hallway, past the thriving classrooms to the furthest part of the school where the library is. The hallways there were empty, not a soul to be found, apart from the figure of one person

My eyes widened as a slight gasp escaped from my mouth.

 _No way._

"Na-Natsume?" I pressed the palms of my hand into my eyes until I saw nothing but a mere blur of colours.

 _Why is he here? He told everyone in the team that he HATES reading._

He turned around _,_ the sunlight reflecting off his _eyes_ causing them to show different shades of red, his raven hair mixing in with multiple types of purple.

"Mikan?"

 _So we were able to meet._

He looked down, looking anywhere but me. "Oh, about yesterday..." I cut him off, wanting him to know what was going on in my chaotic mind.

"Y-yeah" I nodded slowly as I stared at him, "I wanted to talk about that-"

There was a clatter of footsteps behind me, the noise growing louder as it came nearer. "Sakura!" Yelled Mr. Narumi, bending down to catch his breath, "wow, you really do walk fast. Phew, wait a second" he raised one finger, "let me catch my breath".

"NATSUME! YOU BASTARD!" Screamed a voice from down the hallway, "I FOUND YOU! YOU BETTER EXPLAIN WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED YESTERDAY."  
"Oh, it's you" replied Natsume, seeming as if he couldn't care less about the situation he was in.

"DON'T, OH, IT'S YOU, ME! GET YOUR BUM TO PRACTISE!" Kushiro attempted to grab onto Natsume, trying to pull him back to the Archery Club.

I swished my head around to survey the situation, "ah..."

 _Don't leave!_

Natsume grinned as he looked at me, "I'll email you later", with that he turned around and went off with Kushiro, ignoring his ranting. I stood there, alone with Mr. Narumi who looked as if he could drop down dead anytime soon.

 _He said later, but when's that?_

* * *

Time passed and it was soon lunch time, _but still no text from Natsume._

"Hey Mikan and Hotaru! Anna keeps on talking about lewd things!" Anna looked furious as she glared at Koko who was running around the classroom.

"Um, NO I didn't. Stop making things up Kokoro Yome, mature a bit won't you?" Koko grinned as he hid behind Hotaru, who was peacefully eating before Koko came and grabbed her shoulders to use her as a shield.

"OH NO, I'M SOOO SCARED!" Shrieked Koko, sarcasm oozing in his voice as he looked at Anna from behind Hotaru's shoulder.

"Koko, get off me." Koko gulped as he heard that icy voice, _he's dead.  
_ "Oh sheep, I'm sorry Hotaru" he nervously laughed as he muttered "witch" under his breath, which, of course, didn't go unheard by Hotaru who smacked him in the face with his own sandwiches wrapped in tinfoil, Anna gladly joined in squirting water all over him.

I smiled as I heard Koko yelp in pain, but that smile turned upside down as soon as I glanced at the phone on my desk.

 _I really wanted to talk to him today._

* * *

 _The day, is already over._

A sigh escaped from me as the final bell rang, silencing the heavy downpour outside. _He said later, but when is later?_ I shut my book and glanced at the clock, _shouldn't be letting an immature 2nd year get to me._

"Mikan, can you help me pass out the supplementary work for the third years after school from today onwards?" asked Yuu Tobita (the class President) as he put both arms on my desk.

 _Really, after class?_

"Yeah, sure." _Why not? It's pouring outside anyways._

* * *

 _BZZ!  
You've got mail! You've got mail!_

The vibration of the phone in my pocket tickled my senses. I retrieved and unlocked it, revealing a message from..

 _Natsume Hyuuga_

My stomach churned.

 _Re:_

 _Listen, sorry that this is a bit late. I was a little bit busy so I couldn't message you. I'm in the third year's_ _reference room rn (don't ask why) so, can we meet? If you're busy then we could meet up some other time._

I slammed my bag onto the table and ran out of the room, "sorry Yuu! I'll be heading out!" _Gotta hear what that idiot has to say._

"B-but!" I didn't get to hear what Yuu was going to say, I was off. Running through the hallway, past everyone else.

 _I need to talk to him.  
I'm not going to let him play._

* * *

My destination came into view and I slowed down, I got a cramp in my stomach but I was fine. "Natsume!" I waved at the figure standing outside.

He stared at me, his calculating crimson eyes inspecting my face. "Oh, so you weren't busy". I shook my head.

 _We can finally talk._

 _Okay, breathe in..._

"Um, so.."

 _BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ_

"That's mine," he picked his phone up then looked at me, "this will only take a second."

 _Seriously? Can you just message the caller saying that you're busy?_

 _._

"Ru, what's wrong?"

 _Ru..._

That name vibrated through my head.

 _For God's sake, I'm going to find out who Ru is!_

Then I did something I never thought I would ever do.


	19. Chapter 19: Today

_Don't!_

* * *

I could feel my heart in my throat as he picked up his phone, once again drifting further away from me. A long exasperated sigh left my face as I snatched the phone off him, cancelling the call and threw his phone on the wall, a loud clatter was heard as the phone made contact with the ground. He stood there stunned for a moment before glowering at me, "don't you know that it's rude to cut off someone's call when they're speaking to someone?" His upper eyelids raised in a stare, the crimson eyes that once lacked emotion were narrow, rigid and cold. From that moment I knew that I was in deep water.

 _Backing away is not an option._

I tightly closed the margins of my lips, thinning them as his glare on me hardened. "Ah, well.." My voice was weak and broken, fear took over me as I took multiple steps back as he closed onto me.

 _Crap, he's pissed. What do I do?_

My tongue started licking my dried up lips as I gulped, "it's rude to ignore the person you were talking to and just pick up your phone, so you're also at fault." I observed how his eyes remained still, staring at my face for a while before glancing at his phone which was probably smashed. "Really, so I'm at fault?" Angry eyes were just the start, then came the slamming of the door, the glare and two furious eyes.

 _There's no way out._

* * *

"So..." His crimson eyes, both full of one emotion, were studying me as we were locked in an empty room, "what were you doing?" His voice was smooth as he whispered into my ears, raspy and breathless.

 _I can't..._

My face lacked mobility as I skimmed the room, not that I really could since his muscular figure filled up my vision. My eyes shut tight as his scathing stare continued to burn into me, everything about it was uncomfortable and it affected my breathing, making it shallow and constricted.

"What do you want?" he asked, his face shone in the afternoon light, a face drained of any emotion. A sigh escaped from him as he came closer to me, our noses almost touching as I tried to squirm my way out, but his cage like arms were blocking me in, "you're not acting like yourself."

He looked at me as if he was reading a book and I were the pages filled with foreign words, licking his lips he made his way to my ear, "you're acting very desperate." My eyes widened as my muscles tensed.

 _Stop._

A careless smirk was fixed on his face, contradicting the deathly expression from earlier.

"W-What are you on about?" I stiffly laughed, avoiding those eyes that strangled me of breath, "what do you mean by desperate?"  
He chuckled, covering closed eyes with his _soft_ raven bangs,"I said that you inspire me, you never believed me, right?" I choked on whatever words were about to come out of my mouth as he hushed me with his warm palms, "after I said see you later, it was somehow the next day. Even though I said that I'll email you, not even once, no matter how many times you checked your phone.."

 _Shut up._

His gaze shifted to my face as he gently caressed my cheek, my breath hitched, "with just that..." He smiled as he played with my hair, his sharp features relaxing, the movement of his hands moving simultaneously with the my heartbeat, "your mind was filled with me."

I gently frowned, exasperation clear on my face, _how did he know? He's not psychic, right?_ "So what if I have been thinking of you?"

He smugly smiled as he let his arms drop to his side:

 **"You love me"**

* * *

A vigorous cough rang out of my chest.

 _WHAT IS THIS GUY ON?_

"ME?", I pointed to myself as I laughed at him, "LOVES YOU? YOU WISH!" I started clapping like a seal as he continued to smirk at me.

"Yeah, I do wish"

 _Huh?_

Tired restless eyes shone in the light, he looked older as he stared out of the window, "but..." His voice was quiet and strained, like a weak child who was left alone to fend for themselves.  
I found myself imitating him as I glanced at a bird flying outside, "but?"  
He remained quiet, time passing by as the two of us continued to stare outside, a world we were not familiar with, something new, _something..._

My hands felt warm, I saw him grabbing them, forcing his hands onto mine, "it's not enough" he breathed out softly as he gently pushed me against the wall, "forever, I want your mind to be occupied by me and only me. Even more..."

His voice that was once teasing was now speaking softly as his breath blew gently against my ears "think of only me."  
 _Wait, what's happening?_

"If not... Then it might only be a-"

* * *

 _YOU'VE GOT MAIL! YOU'VE GOT MAIL!_

The loud vibration of his phone ruined the atmosphere, both of us sighed as he retrieved the luckily-not-smashed phone from his pocket. He glanced at my red face before putting his phone on silent, then smiled as he held my hands, "it can wait."

 _Just for today..._

* * *

 _(Meanwhile)_

 _The person you are trying to call "Natsume" is currently unavailable, please leave a message after the beep. BEEP._

The sunlight shone down on the said person's face, a soft smile graced their lips as they stared out of the window.

"Love sure is heavy, huh, Natsume..."

They chuckled as the grip on their phone hardened.

"I hope you bring her over."

* * *

 _I want to be with you._

* * *

NOTE: I'm thinking of writing a one-shot... How do you writers manage to simultaneously write 2 separate stories, it's madness!


	20. Chapter 20: Frustration

_"_ Mikan, _look at_ me," his voice was sweet, like honey trying to trap me in my place. Eyes that were ringed red, dilated as rapture swerved through them, imprinting themselves into my mind. I was sedulous, shaking my head around as he tried to get near to me, closer as the gap between us closed.

"Natsume" I breathed out, my voice hoarse like a strained horn, "Natsume, stop." Two unresponsive eyes scanned me, his hands attempted to slip past me onto my waist, breath that was calm and even tickled my nape.

Tender palms circled around my back as he grew nearer, sweat dripped down, comforting warmth covered me as the rough floor messed my hair up, strands of hair stuck to me as my mind was only filled with one person.

 _Only one person.  
Only him._

"Mikan..." his voice echoed through the room, the soft rumbling calming my once tense stance as I quickly melted into his grasp, "you're everything that I desire." It was sweet, my heart swelled as irrational thoughts came over me, I felt high, I felt free, I felt...

 _Snap out of it Mikan!  
It's a lie, it's all a lie.  
You hate this guy.  
You're jealous of him.  
And how he's so perfect._

"Even though you're less skilful than the others, you're earnest and you try your best," _snap out of it_ , "and all of that..." _He's lying, it's all a lie!_ "Is beautiful."

 _He's too perfect._

* * *

 _It's going too fast, the pace, him, everything..._

"Your voice," the volume grew louder as he became more vocal, the closer he comes the more I want to hide, "whenever you call my name I feel thrilled, I'm always looking for you and, whenever I see you I..." He breathed out, relaxing as he held me close, both hands grabbing onto me tight like a child with a toy, "I want to touch you all over."

The room grew hotter, or maybe it was just me. He's like a storm, bringing bitterness when it hits but during the aftermath it's warm, loving and calm.

"I want you, Mikan." _  
_

 _No, stop._

"Natsume, stop," I covered my ears and turned away, only to be forced to face him as his hands roughly grabbed the sides of me head, "Natsume, I don't want to hear anymore, JUST SHUT UP!"

Silence enveloped the room as the tension rose, shuffling was heard from above me, the shadow once looming over my head was replaced with the afternoon light peeping through the window. "That's my like, and I'm serious," his voice broke the silence, a gruff voice, sounding weak, eyes looked weary as he smiled, "Mikan, will you-"

A bright light shone from his blazer pocket, it started flashing, blinding us both with its brilliant light. "Natsume, your phone, see why it's flashing" my voice was tired, heck, I WAS tired, I'm done with this - with him - with these unexplainable emotions running around, leading me on a wild goose chase.

 _I'm sick of this, of everything._

I glanced at him, _he's so beautiful but..._

"Ru?" I asked while a small smile taped my face, my eyes were stinging a bit as they closed, drowsy as I fell on the floor.  
He nodded. Staring at the ceiling helped me clear my mind as I huffed, "Natsume... What's your relationship with Ru?"

 _But I'm still curious._

He froze as his eyes hardened, the light of his screen defining his sharp features. "Is it alright if I... Meet Ru?" I knew that it was too much to ask for, especially after I told him to shut up and leave me be, but I wanted, no, NEEDED to know why the name Ru caused these feelings, why it makes my chest burn like there's fire pumping through my heart.

He looked at me, his eyes drilling into my mine. An endless depth of ink, I couldn't see his whites. "It's none of your business, is it now?"  
My legs gently folded, my whole body felt like ice.

 _Is he bipolar?_

The door behind me slammed shut as hurried footsteps left the scene, the cold breeze from the window flew the thin curtains everywhere as warm light basked onto my face, yet I still felt cold.

* * *

 _(Natsume's POV)  
_

"Natsume, I'm at the Dojo next to the Hospital, do you think you can come over?"

The voice was high in pitch but with an agreeable amount of huskiness to it that it couldn't be mistaken for the opposite gender. My mind was occupied with the events from a few minutes ago, I left her alone, and I felt goddamn guilty.

"What's with that text message just now? You interrupted me," Ru didn't say a word as the line went quiet, the soft chirping of birds introducing the evening was heard instead, "well?" I growled, "you better have a good explanation 'cause I'm pissed."

A laugh, light and airy as if what I said was the funniest thing in the world, "you're dating her right? I want to meet Natsume Hyuuga's new girlfriend, so bring her over."

"I'm NOT dating her. Listen, you're annoying me so I'm gonna end the call, drop my bow and head over. Bye." Whatever words were going to come out of the speaker was silenced as I stuffed the phone in my pocket.

 _What a bloody pain._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

"I'm NOT dating her."

My locker door slammed shut as I recognised that voice, a voice that sounded both annoyed and disgusted. _Is he disgusted by me?_ My stomach churned as I moved back, the locker that was once blocking my view gone, allowing me to spot his charcoal hair being wiped from eyes as red as fire, "Bye." His coat blew against the wind as he stepped outside.

 _I need to meet Ru._

I face palmed as I ran behind him, steps quiet and steady as I contemplated on my actions.

 _Jesus, I'm like those creepy girls in shojo mangas.  
_ _5 years ago I thought that I would be a successful student, look at me now, I'm stalking a guy because he's irritating me. It's not even any of my business._

He turned a corner, stepping into the bustling metropolis, the dawn light illuminating the buildings making them shine like mirrors. The hospital came into view, crisp red leaves from the trees above fell around him, the wind twirling them around.

 _Is Ru some sexy Nurse working at the hospital?  
Or some unfortunate beauty like in those dramas?  
MAYBE she's the daughter of the hospital's head doctor._

 _Nah, that can't be right._

I looked up at the building, marvelling it's intricate design as the breeze blew my hair around.

 _Okay, let's go inside.  
I'm definitely not being a creep._


	21. Chapter 21: Goddamn it woman

"Okay, let's go!"

Exhaustion overcame me as I held onto the tree, lactic acid building up in my legs causing stitches painful enough to make me drop.

 _Or not.  
_ _Okay body, I know that I shouldn't have ran but do you REALLY need to give me a stitch?_

"Lord, my legs ache like mad!" I sat down on a bench underneath the cherry blossom (or sakura), nurturing my foot while searching Google for foot remedies. "Push your fingers gently on the spot to remove the pain", my eyebrows furrowed together, _I think that some of my brain cells just died._ "Good for nothing Google, THAT JUST MAKES IT HURT MORE!" I stuffed the phone back in my blazer pocket and laid my leg on the bench, leaning my head back to rest it on the tree's trunk.

 _Wish Hotaru was here, she would know how to get rid of this stitch._

My eyes closed as light pink petals danced in the wind, the calm breeze kissing my cheeks. _This isn't really helping my foot but it's quite calming._ As I got lost in my own world, one of those rare moments where I can escape reality for a few moments, a shuffling of footsteps was heard. My eyes snapped open, my senses alarming me saying that someone - or something - was coming. _Okay Mikan, calm down, don't panic._ My heart tugged as I stumbled into position, trying to act like a normal 17 year old.

 _Should I get my phone out? Normal teenagers just play with their phones right? RIGHT!? BRAIN, GIVE ME ANSWERS!_

The footsteps grew louder as they grew closer, my fingers fumbled as I retrieved my phone only to put it back.

 _This is gonna look really suspicious, I'll just hide behind the tree. Yes, I'll just hide like a normal, fully functioning person._

My pace quickened when a female voice was heard, sweat dropped from my forehead, my eyes widened when I heard that voice.

"Hyuuga? Where are you? What? WHY are you at the store buying a can of Fanta, he can't drink it you- You selfish Brat, shut up, I'm coming." She barked at her screen before ending the call, a huff was heard from her as she gracefully stepped into the building.

 _No way, that cool voice...  
What is she doing here?_

* * *

 _No, no, wait a minute. Nothing adds up._

I crouched down, holding my aching head in my arms. Nothing seemed to add up. I glanced upwards, my eyes fixed on the falling petals. My mouth was slightly open and lose as I refocused, _she was talking to Natsume right? But she hates him._

"UGH! WHY ISN'T THIS MAKING ANY SENSE?" My mind just shut down as I fell back, I felt like a ball of tangled yarn - yes - one that was just played with and left alone. _Hotaru Imai, why are you so goddamn mysterious?_ I shook my head violently, _is she here to meet Ru? But she's never mentioned that name before. And she seems to have Natsume's phone number, are they close?_ There was a tremor in my heart as that last thought passed through my head, a stinging sensation was felt around my stomach.

 _No, no. I'll just go inside and..._

I halted and leaned against the tree, petals fell on my head making me look like a bouquet of flowers.

 _I don't even know Ru's surname, there's no way I'll even get in there._

* * *

 _They know each other, they know each other, they know each other._

I chanted that sentence in my head as I walked around the hospital.

 _But why didn't she ever tell me that they're that close? I mean, they even have each other's phone numbers!_

My arms hung loosely by my side, my thoughts right now had become nightmares - only escapable by them - they had become fleeting. if I let them float around like unrounded sheep, _what will become of me?_

 _What will happen if I just-_

"COUGH COUGH!" A rough cough was heard, it sounded more painful every time he coughed, then I heard a clatter, like a wooden object was dropped on the floor with so much force that it could break.  
"HEY! ARE YOU OKAY?" I quickly sprang into action as I ran by the blonde man's side, patting his back as I offered him some water from my bottle, "hey, do you want some water?" My heart raced as his coughing grew worse, it sounded as if he was about to vomit any second.

He waved a hand and rejected my offer, "I'm fine" he choked his words in between coughs, "this happens all the time, thanks for offering". He turned sideways giving me a chance to view his cobalt eyes. My face grew warm and I quickly turned away.

 _He's someone who can gently smile, huh?  
Totally the opposite of a certain someone._

He shakenly stood up, using both his bow and me for support, "you do archery?" I asked while gesturing towards his bow, my eyes sparkled as he nodded.  
"Yeah," he replied, his voice sounded airy and light, if it didn't have a raw edge to it I could've mistaken him for a girl. His hair was a nice blonde, the type that shone brightly in the sunlight, his blue eyes contrasted that, almost like the ocean on the beach. _He's clearly foreign._

"Well, thank you, but I better get back to the hospital" his voice sounded force and dry.  
"YOU'RE A PATEINT?!" He nodded, a little bit frazzled from my loud tone. "I'LL CARRY YOUR THINGS!" He smiled, an angel like smile, as he handed me his bow.

 _For some reason, I feel like I've met him before._

* * *

 _(Natsume's POV)_

"Hyuuga." I glanced upwards to be met with a pale girl with a clearly unamused expression plastered on her ugly face.

 _Tch, it's her._

"What do you want, Slug?" My tone sounded bitter as I glared at her, crimson against amethyst eyes full of ice.  
"Are you going to shoot with Ru today as well?" She asked while ignoring my nickname for her, again.

I searched her for any gifts, _aha, she thinks that she's unpredictable but really, she's just as dumb as Mikan._ "Did you bring him flowers again? You know that he doesn't like you like that, so why bother?" I smirked triumphantly as her face grew sour, her eyes hardened as she stared down at my bow.  
"I never said that I liked him and who knows, maybe I'm just like you," she slapped the flowers on my chest, multi-coloured petals flew everywhere as the gerberas burst, "you are really obvious, even if she doesn't realise it maybe because, oh I don't know, she hates you."

I raised a brow as a scowl was present on my face, "you're the one who told her that I knock people's confidence down, it's because of you that she doesn't believe me." I tore the flowers off her and grasped onto them tightly, earning a moment of silence.  
Her tense posture dropped as she held the bridge of her nose, "changing the subject, your parents are wondering where you are, they won't stop calling me. Are you visiting them?" Her eyes were fixated on my face, as if there was something wrong with me.

Forcing the ruined flowers onto her hand I walked away, "of course I am".

 _Or maybe you should keep your nose where it belongs._


	22. Chapter 22: Holy snap

"Excuse me, but..." my voice was confused as I reached out to touch his shoulders, "why aren't we going through the front door?" We were scurrying behind the building, jumping over fences and staying out of view from anyone who might report us. _I feel like a thief and it doesn't feel good._

He turned around, his blonde hair bouncing as he smiled innocently at me, his eyes shone brighter as if he were a child. "Sorry, but to be honest, I'm actually not allowed to come outside so.." His eyes avoided mine as he played with his fingers, "I don't really want to be a nuisance... Especially to them." The last part was uttered silently that I almost didn't hear it.

 _Who's 'them'?_

Pretending not to hear what he said, I grinned childishly to cheer him up. "I don't think you're a nuisance but you really shouldn't be outside." My hold on his bow tightened as a shadow was seen through the window. We both ducked down.

"My body is fine now, but hey, sorry for letting you carry my bow" he whispered while hiding his face behind his arms out of embarrassment.  
I chuckled, "I'm used to it since I'm in the Archery Club at my school".

He looked up, eyes widened making my reflection crystal clear, "really? It's great to meet someone who plays archery as well." He quickly looked around, surveying the scene and stood up to stretch his legs, "when did you start practising?"  
I copied him, "since middle school."

"Sweet, same with me." His smile was like a prince, sweet and calming. We continued to talk about ourselves, but one thing bothered me.

 _I feel like I've met him before.  
But I can't remember anything._

* * *

We took a turn around the back to the back entrance, his eyes looked free as I glanced at him. "I have a friend who's in his 2nd year of High school, what about you?"

I paused for a moment and answered back, "I'm in my 3rd, nearly in University." It was easy to talk to him, it was as if he was telling me everything, no strings, no lies - it was all truthful and I felt appreciated.

"So you're older..." he muttered before turning the handle, he quickly looked at me before gesturing for me to enter first, "I thought we were the same age." He scratched his chin and massaged his chest while walking through the empty corridor lined with scenes of cities around the world, "then we must've met each other, what school do you go to?"

"Alice Academy." He looked up for a brief moment, studying me carefully as if he was trying to remember something. The soft glow of the setting sun from the window glowed on his face, his eyes were blue - but not a describable kind - with splashes of white creeping up around the edges. He blinked and for a moment I was astounded by his beauty, his feminine features was enough to make a woman jealous. His eyes opened, confusion stirring inside as he continued to stare down - that was when my senses melted and came back. "Y-yeah, I'm Mikan Sakura, but you probably don't recognise that name."

"Mikan huh..." His voice lowered to an almost whisper as he turned the door handle to his room, he smiled impishly before introducing himself. "I'm Ruka Nogi, I was in Alice Academy too, but only in the 1st year before I had to pull out."

 _No way._

"I-I know about you!" I stammered as I stared in awe, "you were the ace of the first years! Your archery form was lovely and I remember how I used to always come to the 1st years' competitions to see you."

"Is that so..." He continued to stare at me, but I didn't feel intimidated by him, his eyes were warm despite their cold colour - _unlike a certain someone._ "I actually wanted to meet you too, Sakura, isn't that funny." He raked his blonde hair aside before taking his phone out of his pocket, "excuse me for a moment".

 _Wait, what?_

He elegantly picked up his phone, his light voice answering back to he familiar one from the other end. "Hi Nat, how are you?"

"Ru, where are you?" The other line sounded annoyed, almost mad, as he answered back immediately, Ruka just smiled.

"I felt a bit sick so I returned to my room, see you soon!" The other line ended abruptly but he didn't seem bothered, instead he smiled at me, as if he knew what was on my mind.

 _B-But..._

My eyebrows furrowed together as I looked up at him, "by Nat, you don't possibly mean Natsume Hyuuga, do you?" _Please say no, please say no._ He chuckled and patted me on the head. _Oh snap..._

* * *

 _(Ruka's POV)_

"Yeah, I'm Ru, that's what's been bothering you right?" She gaped up at me, looking like a little goldfish that you just want to protect, _Natsume chose a cute girl_. "You know Sakura, you're pretty easy to read."

I saw her stance, she looked as if she wanted to bang her head onto a wall and never wake up, I guess she expecting something different. Natsume told me about how she always tensed up when she heard the name 'Ru', he just loves to tease her - even though he takes it too far.

"B-but, wha?" She started speaking, buuut I couldn't understand anything, so I just smiled. _I wonder where Natsume and Hotaru are? They're taking a long time, it would be nice to have a little reunion with Sakura involved.  
_

 _Especially after what's been going on._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

"You surprised me, actually, no, I'm more surprised by myself by the fact that I actually STALKED Natsume..." I buried my face into my arms, embarrassed to look at Ruka who was lying in his bed.

"Chin up Sakura, I was surprised by how loud your voice was," he grinned like a carefree child, "you must REALLY like Natsume. Worry not child, Natsume isn't someone who likes to two-time, despite what he's like.. I suppose." He scratched his head before grinning down at me.

"Yeah, but... I'm not even his girlfriend so I don't understand why he didn't let me meet you, especially after we have so much in common. Does he not want me to make new friends?" My eyes started to glass over and I sighed dejectedly at Ruka who held my hands tightly.

"Oh, Sakura", he giggled, his voice echoing throughout the room, "it's because I'm a guy. Despite what Natsume's like, he's, well, like a lot of other guys." He winked at me and ruffled my hair, "we can be friends if you like."

I stared at him, confused, "but Natsume never talks, how am I meant to know what's on his mind?"

Ruka smiled, "that's just Natsume."

 _Mysterious, cold, weird... That's just Natsume._

The door opened, a bang was heard making the two of us snap our head back.

 _Holy snap..._

"Ruka. Why is SHE here?"

 _They're here..._


	23. Chapter 23: Crap

_Written sometime near the end of April  
Re-written on 01/05/18_

It was too messy and it bothered me.

* * *

"Ruka, why is SHE here?" He demanded angrily.

Two eyes rimmed red as if the sun burned them stared back at me, looking as if they could vaporise me on the spot. Amethyst eyes blinked owlishly as the ice in them thawed as soon as they laid their eyes on mine. Out of impulse I stood up shakily on my two feet, like a deer who's just been born, with Ruka's hands gripping onto mine tightly I faced the angry man who stood by the doorway. Taking a massive gulp of my saliva I let the words come out of my mouth, sounding stressed and quiet, "Natsu-"

He cut me off, striding nearer as the fire in his eyes worsened, his eyes flashed over to Ruka, "I told you, Mikan, that my matters are none of YOUR business." he sounded mad, no, scratch that, livid. His fists clenched, slightly shaking as he saw Ruka clenching my hands, Hotaru took a few steady steps back as the scene unfolded.

 _"_ Hotaru? _"_

The room fell silent, the tension so thick that you could slice it. He spoke again, shattering the silence with his booming voice, "Why-"

"Natsume," a serene voice interrupted him, calming him down, "I was sick and she carried my things here, so give her a break, okay?" Ruka's cool eyes that once represented a calm ocean was now a ferocious storm. Ruka saw the expression on his face and tried to compromise with him, "she's my friend, give her a break will you? She hasn't even committed a crime and you're shouting at her as if she's betrayed you or something." He gave Hotaru a look, her face was illuminated by the light of the lamp as she nodded.

"Hyuuga," Hotaru's voice rose above the rest, she moved her hand and indicated the exit with her thumb, "I don't know what happened between you and Mikan but remember this, she's MY best friend. This may not concern me but GET OUT and talk like a normal person." They fell into silence and looked at each other.

I looked uneasily between Hotrau and Natsume, one was tense and motionless while the other had a stare that was calculating and pugnacious. And although there was a bright light from the bowl shaped lamp from above, the atmosphere was anything but _bright_.

Natsume clicked his tongue and glared at Hotaru before looking outside the window, although the sun peaked through the purple clouds, darkness was falling throughout the city. He sounded tired as he looked at me, "it's dark outside, I'll walk you home. Take your belongings."

"Wait Natsu-"

He looked at Hotaru disgustingly and quickly grabbed my arm. "What's the need of communication anyways?" He muttered under his breath, quiet and rough like a storm about to start. He eyed her before stepping out into the hallway, "I'll talk to you later."

* * *

 _(Hotaru's POV)_

I waited for the footsteps to die, the raised voices of disapproval along with them. My company leaned forward, his thin arm holding him up as he reached for the glass of water on the bedside table. "Aren't you worried?" My eyebrows raised as he said this, gulping on a glass of ice cold water he eyed me, "she's your best friend." His eyes weren't their usual deep sea blue, they almost matched the shade of the water but his tone was friendly and invited confidence.

"She's no damsel in distress Ruka Nogi," I felt a smirk come onto my face as he moved back slightly, "besides, gives me another reason to call _them._ " Ruka studied the empty glass in his hands, frowning a little as shouts were heard from outside.

"We don't need to repeat the past Hotaru, maybe Natsume should've named you Coyote instead of Slug", he said, "I don't want someone else to get hurt." I smiled while leaning back against the cold, white walls, my gaze was fixed on the hard tiled floor.

"Don't forget, Ruka, you can't change what happened before, but the future?" The clock chimed as it reached 6PM, "it will always keep the scars from the past."

 _Always._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_ _  
_

My breath was heavy, the evening brightness showed the multiple shadows of the buildings along the desolate road but everything was merging together as we sped downwards. "Natsume, let go!" He kept on dragging me far away from the Hospital, tugging onto my arm so roughly, it was as if I was a mere toy getting pulled by a giant dog. "I SAID IT HURTS, ARE YOU DEAF?"

He roughly dropped my arm, the sound of it slicing through the air due to the force made me cringe. He twisted around and stared levelly at me, bending forwards a little making me squirm under his glare. His pale face made his enticing eyes and unruly hair stand out more. Even though he remained quiet, I could feel the anger emanating off him.

"It's irritating." His tone made me back down, gulping the cold air I shifted nervously. A pigeon's call was heard from above, it's shadow covered Natsume's face making him look more intimidating than he already was. "What the hell were you doing there?"

"I-I don't know..." He kicked a pebble from the pavement onto the road, "N-Natsume, I need to get home."

"Talking to someone else's friend, acting all chummy while you try to worm into our business. Haven't I told you that what I do doesn't concern you? Maybe you should listen to me." His rough hands grabbed both of my shoulders, he reached around and touched my back. "You don't like it when I force a kiss on you, but you don't mind poking your nose where it doesn't belong."

The street was empty, I looked around for anyone, anything, but there was no-one. _No-one._

"Natsume," I attempted to push him away but his hold on my back tightened, his other hand left my shoulder to grab my waist, "I-I need to go back home, it's getting dark and I'm pretty sure that your parents wouldn't want you to be late either so-"

I was interrupted by a large palm silencing me, two deadly eyes glared back, "we don't talk about my parents."

 _Seems like I hit a sore spot._

My muffled words were unheard by the man standing before me, his intentions were unclear and that confused me.

 _"You're coming over to mine, and you're going to tell me everything."_

 _Crap._


	24. Chapter 24: Stronger

_"You're coming over to mine, and you're going to tell me everything."_

* * *

His hold on me tightened, wide palms grabbing tightly onto my thin body caused immense pain. From the outside it might've looked like two teenagers hugging each other as a show of love - but it wasn't. The way his fingernails dug deeply into my skin, forcing me to compile with him, it hurt. An elderly couple, the lady chuckling over a joke the old man cracked as they held hands, noticing this Natsume skilfully moved his hands upwards and pulled me closer - making it look like we were hugging each other.

"Please," he breathed out, loud enough for the couple to hear us, as their attention was fixed on us, "I want to be together."

 _You don't._

* * *

 _(The trio's POV) -_ Koko, Anna and Tsubasa

A dark cloud loomed over Koko as he stared down at his phone, his thumbs fumbling over the buttons as he prepared to message the person he's been trying to call for the past 5 minutes. "KOKO!" Shouted Anna, the autumn breeze messing her pink hair up, "are you calling Mikan again? You're not her boyfriend, you creep!" The Sakura tree that was once in full bloom swung its branches around, leaves that used to be flowers flew into the dusk sky.

Koko sighed, "I know but she's been strange lately," he reached for his pocket and popped a bonbon into his mouth, "it's like Hotaru's taken over her soul or something, like in those ghost movies." He waved his arms around trying to impersonate a ghost, Anna looked uneasily at him before shaking her head.

"Nah, you're taking it too far. Even Mikan can be pretty busy sometimes you know?" She said, "maybe she just needs a moment to relax since our entry exams for University are going to start soon," she too (like Koko had done) reached into her pocket to retrieve a packet of crisps, "just give her a break."

Koko stared at her while slowly munching on his bonbons, "I'm sorry, but don't you at least worry about Mikan?" He wolfed down the packet and threw it in the bin, "'cause it doesn't sound like you do."

"Relax you freak, you sound like a monkey without bananas," she straightened up and walked through the school gates, twisting slightly to call Koko, "HEY! You wanna go to McDonalds or not?" Koko made a calculating facial expression (like that meme) and followed after, he shook his head while tutting.

"You're heartless, aren't you? Talking about McDonalds while baby Mikan is outside in the world full of cold humans, maybe we should convince her to stay in the dorms with us." Anna ignored him and walked forwards but stopped, put her hand over her head and she squinted to take a look at the man standing by the tree outside the school.

"Andou?"

Koko looked perplexed as he leaned forwards to get a better view of the blue haired man, "Mr. Kill-Joy? OH WOW, IT'S MR. KILL-JOY! HEY! KILL-JOY, BLUE HAIRED FREAK! OVER HERE!" He waved his arms around causing Anna to hide her head in embarrassment as the young boy shouted across the road.

"And you say I'm the weird one" she huffed as she backed away.

After a while the shouting stopped and Anna peeked through the gap between her fingers to see two eyes staring at her, "why isn't he answering?" He turned to face Anna for answers, "is he sick?"

"Yeah, sick of you." Anna said shortly.

* * *

 _(Tsubasa's POV)_

My eyes were fixed on the leaves, it's sad to see how quickly time goes by, one minute you're a young child enjoying life to the fullest, next you're a soon-to-be adult worrying about the future. A maroon leaf fell from the branch above, landing on my nose and tickling my senses.

 _Ah, but then again_ , _if we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, then I guess we aren't really living..._ (online quotes for le win).

 _I wonder why we grow? Is it so that my parents won't have to work hard? But then again, they would work hard no matter how old I am, BUT THEN AGAIN, if they stayed as kids then I wouldn't be born. BUT THEN AGAIN, if they stayed as kids then they wouldn't have met each other and gotten married._ I sighed heavily and banged my head against the trunk of the tree, 'Lost' played out of my headphones as I turned the volume up, causing students walking past to swivel their heads around to glance at me before walking away.

 _Chipsus, I don't think I'm ready to become an adult._

Looking at the pavement dejectedly, I sat on the curb, my knees up so I could lean on them. I stared intently at a squirrel running up a tree, feeling a bit hungry after an intensive brain thought processing I reached to my shopping bag for my packet of beef flavoured crisps. But it was missing. The squirrel from the tree jumped down and scurried around me, holding the packet in its mouth. "HEY! YOU CRISP THIEF!" I chased it across the road but that little nipper was out of sight. "Jesus, where did he go?" Out of breath, my blue hair flopped to the side of my face as I leaned against the golden gates.

 _Actually, isn't this her school... If that's the case then..._

My head snapped up, my eyes scanned the area for one person.

 _Oh god no._

Two students who were my age stood by the gates, a pink haired female hid her face behind her hands while a sandy haired one had widened eyes with a Cheshire Cat-like smile as he noticed me looking at him. "YO ANDOU!" Anna looked up to greet me.

"Hey Andou, seems like you're still in the area." The school behind her was eerily quiet and it seemed like we were the only people here.

 _I knew this school was haunted._

"Ah yeah," I replied sharply, my eyes still on the school, "I'm heading back home, but, uh... You know..." They both looked at me, I flapped my around trying to get rid of the strange feeling erupting in my chest, "has Sakura said anything about me? I gave her my email address a few days ago so..."

Koko looked dumbfounded, he grabbed my shoulders and violently shook me, "SO YOU'RE THE REASON WHY MIKAN'S ACTING STRANGELY!" He shouted, "I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU GAVE HER YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS!"

"Really?" I replied hopefully, my face lightened up a tad as he nodded furiously, "so she's interested in me as well?"

Koko was about to reply when Anna ducking mood-breaker butted in, "heads up boys, let's just get to McDonalds, you can come too Andou. You guys make my head hurt."

 _So Sakura's interested in me too, huh?  
Things are looking up._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

"Come in."

My heart was palpitating. It was quiet in his apartment - not to mention modern. In the corner stood a lone shoe rack with no shoes on it, the corridor from the door leading to the other rooms was empty and dark, white was everywhere - on the floors, wall, even the furniture.

"Good evening..." I called out in my nervous voice, still wary of the look he was giving me from the corner of my eyes, "p-pardon my intrusion..." There was only silence, an echo of my voice returned back to me along with a shuffling from my side as Natsume took his shoes off. _This is odd, there's no way he lives by himself right? He's only 16..._

"Natsume?" He replied with a huff, "there's no-one here, so, um... Is it alright for me to come in?"

It was all a rush, first the lights went out, then a bang, the bang was only the start of it as I pushed against the hard wall. I was covered by an entity, my senses filled with both darkness and this man (who I presumed was Natsume) the only things I could sense. I trembled with fear, as I girl I knew that I was physically weaker than him even if I was a year older. "NATSUME GET O-" My words were muffled against his fiery palms.

"Save your words for later."

Goosebumps appeared on my neck as his hot voice whispered roughly against my ear, a warm sensation covered my mouth.

 _I wish I was stronger.  
Just a little bit.  
To say no.  
To push him away._


	25. Chapter 25: Let's talk

The feeling that was erupting in my chest stung more than the force of his lips on mine. Everything was rapid and my chest stung painfully as he pushed me harder against the wall. Seeing as his lips left mine for air, I took my chance:

"Natsu-"

"Shut up," his voice growled in my ear before getting off me, his eyes stared into as if he was searching for something. I laid against the wall, beet red and bothered, _why does he always do this to me? One moment he's decent the next he's like a savage animal._ He came closer, his arms winding around my waist to reach for my back, "your body's cold" he stated, "I'll prepare something warm, okay?". He left me and walked into the darkness of the corridor ahead, "sit in the living room, it's to your left."

 _How is he so good at acting like nothing happened?_

 _I hate him._

* * *

Slapping myself, I entered the room to my left through the glass door, it was empty with only a white rug, shelf, TV and sofa - matching with the white of the walls and floor. It was pristine, as if no-one even comes here. The view from the wide window leading to the balcony was beautiful, the city lights of Tokyo were clear and it was calming in contrast to the uncomfortable feel of the room.

 _This room gives me shivers._

Shaking the feeling off I sat down while admiring the cleanliness of the room, there wasn't a speck of dust anywhere - even on the wooden floors - but, _why does it feel so lonely?_ Sighing I waited as the clock ticked, it was 6PM, _maybe I should message mum._ My fingers felt numb and heavy as I reached for the phone wedged in my pocket, once I got it out I attempted to turn it on:

 _AGH! IT'S DEAD! What great timing._

Frustrated, I stayed still, curling myself up into a ball and letting my hair fall against me, covering me up like a blanket. _Staying in this room is making me go mad, where is Natsume?_ Wondering where my 'lovely' host was I stood up and tried to look for the kitchen.

 _THUD_

Before I managed to reach for the door I heard something heavy fall behind me. _I'm dead, I'm dead, I knew this room was strange!_ Scared to turn back my blood pumped rapidly through my veins as I counted down from 10. Noticing that the room was eerily silent I turned my head slightly to eye the marble clock fixated beside the door, _it's frozen at 6, damn Natsume needs to change the batteries, what if his phone is broken like mine and he needs to check the time?_ Feeling a little bit braver I whipped my head around to notice that a red book had fallen off the shelf. _Should I touch it? What if it's haunted?_ Hesitating slightly, I reached out to the book and turned it over so I could see the cover.

"Al...bum?" I said uneasily as I scanned the faded golden lettering on (what appeared to be) red leather, "is this Natsume's?" Just then the door slammed open, it was surprising how the glass didn't shatter due to the force used to open it. Natsume stood by the doorframe, his raven hair and sharp eyes standing out in the plain room. In his hands he held a white mug with milk, the abnormal amount of steam coming from it surrounded Natsume, making him look more mysterious than he already was.

"Seems like you've found my album," his voice was light and he remained calm but something told me that there's more than what meets the eye.

 _I didn't even hear him walk from the kitchen._

"Ah, yeah..." I replied, _so it is his,_ he eyed the album in my hands, "it fell off the shelf so I was going to put it back on."

He entered the room and closed the door behind him without a sound before sitting on the floor beside me, "here's your milk," I nodded while taking hold of it, _it's actually not that hot despite the amount of steam coming from it._ "You know..." he continued, fixing his gaze on the city outside, "you can read it if you want, I don't mind."

"Really?"

He briefly nodded before opening the book fro me, "if I say something I mean it." He stared at me like he did when we were in the corridor, trying to erase that memory I frantically turned the pages.

"How cute! It's you and baby Aoi!" _He was actually a cute kid, what went wrong?_ Glancing at the man to my right I noticed how he continued to stare out into the city, paying little attention to what I was saying and doing. Feeling ignored I continued to turn the thick pages before noticing something. "Hey Natsume," I nudged him a bit to get his attention.

He looked at me annoyed, "what?"

"He-hey, I was wondering, there are a lot of pictures of Aoi when she was a baby but how come there are none of you?"

He remained silent for a minute before speaking again, "I came to this house when I was 5, so there are no pictures from earlier than that." He surveyed the room before sighing, "this is my uncle's house, I was sent here because of some..." he paused, "issues. Aoi lives with our parents, in case you're wondering."

"Oh, really?" _I never knew that,_ "so, do you and Aoi ever talk to each other outside of school?" It was somehow easier to talk to him, _it's like he's opened up a bit._

His eyes never left the album in my hands as he answered my every question, "no," he said somewhat uneasily, "we don't."

 _But they seemed so close at school, what happened to the Hyuuga siblings?_

"Is that so..." I mused, _the infamous siblings are more complicated than they look,_ "at least you had your uncle, I can't really imagine a 16 year old living alone in an apartment as big as this." Once again he looked lost as he gazed out, looking like he'd never seen a city before.

"I'm alone." He stated, sounding firmer than his previous answers, he probably noticed my concerned look before quickly saying, "I have 2 important people with me." My chest burned a little as he said this, _Hotaru's probably one of them, am I jealous over the fact that he's closer to her than I am?_ I hummed in response, turning the pages to see a picture of 2 boys and a girl, _that must be Ruka, Hotaru and Natsume._ "We've been... close ever since we were kids" he remained quiet before adding a quick, "I guess".

Not really paying attention to him, my entire focus was on the picture in front of me, they were dressed up in vintage clothes while sitting , "how did you 3 meet?"

"Family." He stated quickly before standing up to walk out of the door, "I didn't really plan on telling anyone, so thanks." He picked up my mug and placed the album on the shelf before leaving the room.

"Natsume!" He halted, "thanks for telling me!" _Because although you're still not telling me everything, I am grateful._ Before he closed the door he turned to face me, his signature smirk playing on his face as he placed the mug on the table beside the door, "let's talk some more in my room."

* * *

NOTE:

As the story is getting more confusing, I'e realised (a long time back) that people might find it confusing. So, if you have any questions about the story just ask either in the reviews or PM, I don't mind.


	26. Chapter 26: Words are useless

"Hey Natsume!" I yelled out, my face felt flushed as the 16 year old tured to face me, "thanks for telling me about the album."  
He back and walked out into the dark corridor, his feet made no sound as he did so, "no problem."

* * *

 _(The Trio's POV)_

Tsubabsa slurped on his cup of sprite as he lounged on the red seat in the bustiling McDonald's, "since the day I gave Sakura my email address she's been weird, right?" He smacked his lips and placed his drink next to his hamburger, finding it hard to cover his joy he puckered his lips, "there's no mistake about it, guys! She likes me." Koko cowered in his sit while depressingly chewing on his wrap, his eye drifted around the place as he muttered some incoherent words.

Anna sat there pissed and angrily bit the straw of her vanilla milkshake, "then WHY hasn't she sent you any mail yet, Andou?" She spat out, she was clearly possesive of her daughter Mikan, "if she liked you then she should've sent you a message saying 'oh Tsubabsa Andou! I love you!' or 'ACCEPT MY AI!" She imitated Mikan and her high pitched voice, a couple of customers around them looked at her before moving away, "right Koko?"

"Suppose so..."

Tsubasa laughed hysterically before taking a bite of his burger, a smug face similar to that of Natsume's adorned his face, "isn't she just being shy?" He asked the two teenagers opposite him, "AAAHHH! A SHY MIKAN! HOW CUTE!" He held his blushing face and wriggled around his seat, Anna glared at him in disgust.

 _Tch, what a creep._

The table froze as they heard the infuriated voice of male from behind them, "WHERE THE HECK IS NATSUME ANYWAYS?" After hearing the name of his long-term rival, Tsubasa subtly arched his head to peek over the seat to the table behind him, a clearly annoyed gray haired boy was being talked to by a red haired girl who was attempting to calm him down.

 _Hyuuga? MY LONG TIME RIVAL? Gotta lsiten to this._

"Calm down Youiichi, just put Natsume's name down for the next prefecture selection," asked the girl, she was eating her nuggets in a decent manner while her partner's state was quite a contrast to hers. The boy named Youiichi glared at her and stole a nugget, "HEY!"

He angrily chewed on it and swallowed it down - hard. His eyebrows were furrowed together as he noticed Tsubasa peeking over the seat in front, he stared at him darkly causing Tsubasa to squirm a little before facing the lady opposite him again, "we can't do that sis! If he finds out then he'll cancel it last minute, then we'll be screwed."

Misaki sighed heavily as she patted his head, "say, Youiichi, let's go home and you can message him, the chargers here don't work and I only have 5%." The younger boy stood up to throw his waste away, then stomped off, Misaki followed closely behind and avoided making eye contact with anyone. Tsubasa (after finding out they were gone) turned back to face his company and struggled to control his emotions as he planned to spread the gossip.

"Hey, hey! Did you hear that?" He excitedly switched his gaze between Koko and Anna, Anna looked focused on a thought while Koko, well, just sat there leaning on his arm.  
"Psh" replied Koko, "I always knew a snotty guy like him was troublesome."  
"I'll call Mikan" said Anna as she neatly wiped her mouth with a tissue, "I wonder where she is."

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

The alarm clock by his bed kept on ticking, it was like a countdown, the sound on the hands spinning around filled up the sparse bedroom of Natsume Hyuuga. His double bed stood in the middle of the room, two glossy bedside tables stood at each side with nothing on them but paper, a wooden desk lay in the corner of the room, the grand walk-in-wardrobe was situated opposite the on-suite while the breeze from the balcony outside blew his white covers around.

 _Is everything in this house white?_

Standing awkwardly by the doorway of his luxury room, I waited for him to say something. "Sorry," he said in a voice that lacked guilt, "the only place we could sit is..."

I searched the room for any seats, there wasn't any.

"The bed." He gestured to the bed as if he wanted me to sit down, "should I get you a drink?"  
I hesitated before answering, "no... I'm good. I'll just, uh, admire the view outside while you get yourself something to eat, okay?" I was wary of him after what happened once we entered, so there was NO WAY I was sitting on the same bed as him, _couldn't we just sit in the dining room?_

"Suit yourself," he replied before turning on one foot to exit the room, "I'll bring something for you whether you want it or not." Once the door shut I was left alone in the room, an immense feeling of 'something' took over me as Goosebumps appeared on my arms.

 _This room gives the same vibe as the living room._

"It's such a big room, if he's so rich then why doesn't he bother to decorate the place properly?" I asked no-one in particular as I snooped around the room, "whoa, his clothes are all major bands" I stood there in awe as I peeked into his wardrobe , _I feel like a peasant compared to him._

Tapping my foot on the tiled floor I searched the walls and the desk for any photographs, there weren't any. _The only thing that screams Natsume here is his computer, wardrobe and bow, I mean, unless white is his favourite colour. Who decorated this place anyways? Hotaru?_

"Actually..." I stared out of the window like Natsume had done before, "knowing their relationship Hotaru was probably the one who decorated it..." An unexplainable grabbed my senses, it was stronger than the feeling when I walked into the living room and the bedroom. "What if..."

I flinched as the door burst open, blank sheets of paper that were left on the bedside table flew everywhere, Natsume stood by the door, his head was tilted to the side as his eyes darted around the room, "do you like pizza?" He asked in a gruff voice.

"Y-Yeah..." I replied, shocked by his sudden entrance, "but I need to get back home, my parents will be worried so..."

He lunged forwards and grabbed my arm, "it's fine, just call them using my phone and tell them that you're eating dinner at Aoi's house." He handed me his phone and unlocked it for me.

.

"But..." His gaze on me was intimidating so I did as I was told like a frightened sheep getting chased by a wolf, dialling my mum's I waited for her to pick up, _"hey mum, I'm at Aoi's house."_

 _"IT'S 7 O'CLOCK! MIKAN SAKURA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"_ My mum's voice rang through my ears as I attempted to answer her.

 _"I was teaching Aoi some Biology and she invited me to her house saying that she wanted to treat me for helping her, so..."_ I glanced at Nastume who still firmly held my arm, he didn't say anything. _"I'll be home by 9."_

My mum seemed to have calmed down as I said Aoi's name, _"oh! Aoi! I remember her, she's such a darling. Invite her over sometime okay?"_

 _"Sure."_

 _"Should I come pick you up?"_ She asked, I shook my head at this.

 _"No, mum, I'll be fine, see you later."_

.

I ended the call and gave Natsume his phone back. "I'm going to call for pizza, you stay here," he then attempted to leave me again - alone in this room which gives me the shivers.

"Wait, Natsume!" I grabbed his shirt to hold him place, despite him clearly being physically stronger then me he stayed there and listened to what I had to say, "can we talk in the dining room instead?" He stayed still for a brief moment, then the door slammed.

All I could see was him as he looked down on me, "there's a reason why we're in my room," he said in a low voice, his hands reached for me as he pushed me onto the king sized bed, a smirk was evident on his face as he looked at the trembling me.

"No, Natsume let me-"

"Words are useless against me, Mikan Sakura."


	27. Chapter 27: Eh?

_"There's a reason why we're in my room," he said in a low voice, his hands reached for me as he pushed me onto the king sized bed, a smirk was evident on his face as he looked at the trembling me._

 _"No, Natsume let me-"_

 _"Words are useless against me, Mikan Sakura."_

* * *

My breath quickened, even with my eyes shut I could feel the heat from Natsume as he covered me, my body was shaking unconsciously. Hearing the bed creak as the figure left I immediately sat up and guarded myself with a pillow as the man sitting on the end of the bed covered his face as he smiled.

"Mikan," he said as he tried to hide the smile, "you're too easy." I blinked as he continued to sit there, looking at me with his glimmering eyes that held a locked up feeling in them.

"What do you mean by easy?" I replied while throwing the soft cushion at him, he dodged it. Feeling annoyed I stood up and walked towards him, the sound of my feet on the polished wooden floor echoed throughout the room, "you just love teasing me don't you?"

The smile washed away and was replaced by a devious smirk, "how'd you know?" A 'humph' escaped from my mouth as he continued to tease me, he pulled a clump of my hair which caused me to trip on my own foot. "You're an idiot," the smirk widened as I managed to stand up.

"Geh! Stop bullying me!" He blocked my punch with just one hand and pulled my towards him so that we were just a few inches away from each other. Feeling embarrassed from the closeness I pushed him away and staggered backwards while covering my face, "you're so annoying."

Not bothering to fix his bed up, he stood up and dragged me by the arm, "let's continue this in the dining room."

"Natsume Hyuuga, stop changing the subject!" I shouted, but my words went out through the other end of his ear as I was dragged through the corridor to another door.

 _My heart's racing really fast though._

* * *

When the door opened I felt a gush of the cold city air, my eyes surveyed the room and I noticed that the sliding door to the balcony was wide open. "Natsume, aren't you cold?" I asked the man who was busy on his phone.

"Hm?" He looked up from the phone, the dim light reflected on his eyes making them look purple as he registered the situation, "oh, no." He slid the phone on the marble table top as he closed the door, "but if you're cold then I might as well close it." I nodded in appreciation, my mouth in a thin line as an air of awkwardness fell over the room. "Why don't you sit down" he finally said in an attempt to break the ice.

"Y-yeah", feeling frazzled I turned to face the table, it was right in the middle of the room. A sliver chandelier hung from the ceiling, the light from it reflected off the glass table making it shine bright. "Natsume? Where do I sit?" _Why is there only one chair if he lives with his Uncle? Oh right, he said that he lives alone in his Uncle's house, strange._

"Why don't you sit on the floor like a dog?" He replied in a teasing manner as he opened the fridge of the kitchen that was connected to the dining room, "you look act like one so it shouldn't be a problem."

"H-hey! I am NOT a dog" he chuckled quietly as I sat on the floor anyway. I continued to be in a bad mood as I glared at him preparing drinks from the side of my eye. _How is his kitchen so big and white?_ I watched him as he opened a cupboard to get two cups, peering inside I noticed how apart from the two cups it was virtually empty. _Since his kitchen looks pretty bare I guess he doesn't cook that much._

Seeing him walk towards me holding 2 cups of lemonade I frantically turned away to avoid suspicion, _I definitely wasn't staring at his figure._ "Here's your drink, Mikan", he handed me the cold cup, my lips felt like ice as I drank it.

"Thanks..." _Jesus Christ, did he store this in the freezer?_ The room was silent apart from the sound of the chair getting pulled on the tiled floor which made me cringe, "hey Nastume", I called out to him with the intent to find out more about him, "aren't you lonely? I mean, you live by yourself in such a big apartment." _I would go mad if I were you._

He calmly sipped on his drink, not affected at all by the temperature of it, "not really, I'm used to it." He didn't even look at me as he quickly answered the question.

"Oh..." My mouth made an 'O' shape as I shifted uncomfortably on the cold floor, "then you must be on good terms with your Uncle, right? He gave you such a big apartment." _That also means that your Uncle is freakishly rich._

He placed his cup on the table, the loud clang of two pieces of glass hitting each other made me cover my ears. "I don't really talk to him." I peered at him and saw his face harden, the hold on his cup tightened. I opened my mouth to ask what happened between the two but immediately shut it as I saw his current state, he looked as if the topic made him feel threatened or uncomfortable. "Is it okay?" he asked after a brief moment of silent, clearing his throat he turned to face me, "we're only talking about me."

His eyes never looked at me as he spoke, but I ignore it to not repeat what happened earlier, "it's fine, I wanted to talk anyway!" I sat cross legged and placed my cup in the floor, "up until now you've talked too little." He nodded and stared at the cup in his hands, looking as if he was admiring the craftsmanship. Attempting to bring back the conversation, I changed the subject, "Did you know that I saw Ruka before the Middle School Tournament last year? I felt like I've seen him before and then I remembered."

He abruptly picked up my cup and walked back into the kitchen after hearing Ruka's name, "I knew" he said in a quiet voice.

"Eh? Then why were you so defensive about him? It would've been fine if you just introduced him to me."

The sound of water running from the tap intervened in our conversation along with the clanging of glass, he turned to face me while ignoring the water flowing, "hey, you're wasting wat-"

"'Cause I don't like it."

 _Eh?_


	28. Chapter 28

_"'Cause I don't_ _like it"_

* * *

 _(Ruka's POV)_

"I'm leaving this shabby place", her raven locks swayed as she turned her back to me, "have fun dying for one more day bunny boy."

"H-hey!" I shouted back at her, _Jesus, she's never optimistic about anything,_ "is it really okay?" She halted and turned her head slightly so I could see her glare from the corner of her eyes, her amethyst iris dazzled in the light of the hospital room, her entire figure stood out in the room white in attire.

"What is?" she asked coldly, her tone hardened and she was visibly uncomfortable despite the strong front she tried to put on, but I knew her and how she really was.

"She's your best friend, isn't she? Are you sure she's going to be fine with..." My throat contracted and I found it harder to breathe as Hotaru swivelled around to face me, she closed the door quietly so no-one could hear our conversation, "Natusme being with her?"

She parted her lips slightly but soon shut them, instead of sighing like how I predicted from her she grabbed the glass on the table beside my bed and filled it up with cold water, "why wouldn't I be?"

Instead of her I was the one feeling annoyed by her game, "Imai," I sighed, "you know why. Natsume, he could..." She gulped down the water and slammed the cup on the table, fire roared in her eyes causing me to squirm in my seat.

"You're getting released tomorrow aren't you?" I nodded sheepishly, "then why don't YOU go to her since you're so worried about it."

Then she stormed off leaving a half empty cup of water alone.

 _Seems like I have something to do tomorrow._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

Natsume stayed where he was, his hands were playing with each other as his eyes stared down on the tiled floor. "I wouldn't like it if you fell for him", an air of awkwardness fell over the room, the dim light from the lamp by the table reflected on his face which defined his knitted eyebrows, however, his eyes remained calm as he rubbed his palms.

"W-what?" It felt like my heart was going to jump out from my throat, I didn't believe him and all I could was smile out of confusion, "w-what's with that reason? That's not ever going to happen anyways..." _Since Ruka is a completely different level of beauty compared to me._

His shadow that covered the floor clearly showed his rigid position, his back was arched slightly as he leaned on the kitchen counter, "I was there too, you know," his face looked doleful as his crimson pools stared into mine.

"O-oh..." _What do you expect me to say?_ Feeling his eyes as they scan me caused Goosebumps on my arms, the uncomfortable feeling made something as simple as gulping painful, "say, what about the pizza? You should check when it's-"

"Additionally, you're going to graduate soon and I want to spend more time with you", he jumped off the counter landing silently and walked slowly towards me, his eyes never left me like I was his prey, "even though you're an idiot and sometimes I lose my mind because of you, I don't want you going off to anyone else."

"Natsu-"

The ringing of the doorbell from the front door was heard, I sighed in relief but Natsume's face was the complete contrast of mine. He looked annoyed, as if he was going to kill someone soon, a frown fixed his face and the serene expression that graced his face before was gone and a scowl replaced it, "I'll get it" he said, but there was something much darker underneath that tone.

As soon as he left a muffled vibration was heard from the left side of the room where the kitchen was situated, the vibrating continued and feeling irritated I stood up to see what it was. My knees felt weak and were an ugly shade of red since I sat down for a long period of time, _I blame Natsume for this. What's with him? He was all sweet but creepy and then he took a complot 180 degrees turn and became someone completely different._

It wasn't hard to find the source of the noise as his black phone stood out in the white room, as I got nearer I crinkled my nose in disgust, _it stinks of bleach._ I quickly picked the phone up and looked at the notification:

 _Hotaru Imai:_

 _We need to talk._

 _Hotaru?_ A strange feeling erupted in my stomach, _what does she want?_

A bang woke my numb senses as I immediately placed the phone back where I found it, "why are YOU here?" Nastume's voice rang throughout the apartment as he sounded livid while talking to someone whose voice was hushed by his. I ran out of the room, my heels ached from the contact with the hard floor but I wondered what made Natsume so mad. My breath was shallow as I peeked from the corner of a wall, there out in the corridor I saw Nastume Hyuuga caging a clearly angry Hotaru Imai.


	29. Chapter 29: Is this the right thing?

_T_ _here, out in the corridor, I saw Nastume Hyuuga caging a clearly angry Hotaru Imai._

* * *

"Why are you here? I don't want your slimy trail around my house." Natusme snarled at the raven haired girl who was a head shorter than him, any normal person would have fainted on the spot but Hotaru wasn't anyone normal, instead she faked a smile and spoke back through gritted teeth.

"I think you're grading your house too high, I was outside a few minutes ago until you pulled me into this dump." She fuelled Natsume's anger by covering her nose with her free hand.

 _God, Hotrau sure knows how to hit a spot.  
_ It was a tedious experience hiding behind the bend at the back of the corridor, my heart was racing and sweat was dripping down my forehead. My hands clammed up and it felt painful whenever I tried to move my fingers.

 _She's probably here to talk about that text._

"Your face looks ugly when you frown, Mikan hates guys like you," she said to the boy whose fingers were inching up her neck, "if you hurt me not only will you be on the news, but you'll also lose Mikan's trust, not that you ever had it anyway." Natsume's eyes flared and he violently slammed Hotrau's shoulder into the wall causing a loud bang to echo throughout the desolate apartment, I winced at the intensity of the sound and peeked from behind the wall to spy on Hotaru who painfully held her shoulder.

 _NO! HOTRAU!_

 _Okay Natsume Hyuuga, I've had enough of you and your ways._

"Is that all you've got Hyuuga?" Hotaru appeared to have recovered quickly although she was still clenching her shoulder.

"You really are full of yourself," Natsume smirked as he raked his hair back, "this is why Ruka doesn't like you."

Hotrau appeared to have flinched slightly which was uncharacteristic of her, _I've never seen Hotaru look this weak before._ Hotrau was always strong, a true sadistic warrior at heart but at that moment she looked weak in comparison to the man standing before her. Unable to watch my best friend in pain both mentally and physically I stepped in.

"Natsume, stop hurting her!" My legs were quivering, my chest felt like there was acid in it making it hard to breath, I was panting hard and fear quickly took over me as I tucked my hand that accusingly pointed at Natsume behind my back, "i-it's not acceptable."

Both Natsume and Hotaru snapped their heads around, "Mikan?" Natsume immediately let go of Hotaru and walked towards me, his eyes had softened but I could see anxiety in them, Hotaru on the other hand remained neutral and stared at us to see what would happen.

"Mikan" said Natsume as he wrapped his arms around my waist to pull me in, "Mikan..."

"N-Nastume, I need to go home," I pushed him away with my hands but he didn't budge, _after what I saw I need to go with Hotaru,_ "Natsume," I pleaded, "please?"

He arched his back a little to look at me and bit his lips as if he wanted to say no. "Let her go", Hotaru raised her voice at Natsume, her bangs covered her eyes and no emotion was on her face but it was clear that she was mad.

Natsume raised a brow before looking at the clock on the wall and sighed, "I'll take you home, get your things."

"She's not a baby Hyuuga, she can go by herself," Hotaru walked over and held my arm, "and before you say no it's not like it's midnight, it's only 7 and there's still some daylight."

Natsume remained quiet and shoved his hands in the pockets of his pants, he looked conflicted as he glanced out the window. He looked at Hotaru and nodded, "okay". I smiled in relief but glanced briefly at Hotaru, my body felt sluggish and the happiness that was once in my heart vanished.

 _Will she be alright? I guess she's just going to talk about the text message._

* * *

 _(Hotaru and Natsume after Mikan left)_

Silence fell over the room and Mikan's steps that were scattering away could be heard, the ticking clock that was once silenced by the shouting of the 2 was now ticking irritably much to Hotaru's disdain.

"I'm surprised that the people living below you didn't come up to complain" her eyes glared at the boy whose back was facing her, his head was down and he remained silent. "We created quite a mess, like always. You scared her," her icy tone was directed at Natsume who remained unaffected.

"You wanted to talk," he turned his head slightly to view her from the corner of his eyes, the soft light from the setting sun (because it's summer so the sun sets later) made her seem ethereal but it couldn't melt the ice in her eyes, "so talk".

Hotaru tapped her foot, matching the rhythm of the ticking clock, "one, my shoulder still hurts like hell thanks to you and two, what's with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Hyuuga, I don't think you should get into any serious relationships" she said, "or else I'll have to call them."

Natsume shrugged and sighed loudly, as if he got a heavy feeling off his shoulders, "you do that and you'll face hell" he eyed her, "and I don't really want them coming here." He walked over to the kitchen and left the sly girl alone.

Hotaru clicked her tongue, "Hyuuga, you're not stable enough and you know that."

The door slammed shut and thus she was once again left with nothing but her thoughts in the empty hallway.

 _He's going to regret it soon._

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

 _I'm going to regret this soon, maybe I should've stayed._

The sound of the elevator as it reached the ground floor brought me back to reality, my legs felt sluggish and I dragged myself out into the lobby. _How rich is Natsume anyway? A 16 year old living alone in a penthouse on the 30th floor of an apartment complex in the centre of Tokyo makes him sound like a young master or something._

The lobby was quite empty apart from a few families admiring the huge white rose statue in the middle of the room, it's stem dug into the marble floor and it spread every where around the place. There was a blonde haired man wearing a blue polo shirt with khaki shorts admiring the magnificent structure, he was drinking some Starbucks and was chatting amiably with a mother and her daughter.

 _Is that who I think it is?_

I leaned forwards and slightly squinted to get a good look at the man, he turned around and I fumbled back into place keeping my back straight.

 _He really does look like Ruka, he's even got those nice blue eyes._

He seemed to have noticed me as well and ran up to where I was. "Mikan! Haven't seen you for 2 hours, how are you?" His smile was kind and refreshing and his voice had that airiness to it that it sounded like it could make you drunk if you listened to it for too long.

"R-Ruka?" _It's really Ruka, isn't he meant to be in hospital?_ "Ye-yeah, I'm cool but aren't you meant to be in the hospital?"

His eyes shone brightly like the summer's sky on a cloudless day, "well I was but I asked the nurses if I could get released early and they agreed" he grasped my hands, "and I was on my way to see Natsume but I guess Hotaru beat me to it, so I was on my way home and judging by the fact that you exited the elevator I guess you are too." He threw his drink in the bin next to the elevator door and pulled me along with him outside, "so, want to walk together?"

* * *

 _(Hotaru and Natsume)_

Natsume sat down on the lone seat in the dining room, in his hands he held a glass of water which he drank slowly from. It was quiet out in the hallway which raised Nastume's suspicion that Hotaru might be up to something but knowing her he just let it drop until she came to him first because that's how it always was - people came to him and it had never changed until now. To him it was just curiosity at first, it had been 2 years since all women apart from his sister and Hotaru were stripped from his life and he was bored of the same people, so he decided to play and so far it's been pretty...

 _Boring._

 _The only exciting thing I remember her doing is when she nearly broke my phone and when she shouted at me for something that I've forgotten._ He stared outside at the glass buildings which reflected the last remaining light of the day. _But I wonder if she's alright._ Natsume sighed and leaned against his arm while sipping his water, the apartment was eerily silent but that didn't affect him, he's been used to it for the lastdecade.

 _That dumb uncle of mine never comes home anyway, he's probably out with some new woman or something, or he's bought a new place and is staying there with some prostitute._

He chuckled darkly at his own joke, _just kidding, but it's probably true._

Feeling bored he placed his cup on the table, not bothering to clean up and stepped out into the hallway that connected all 8 rooms together. _Is Mikan alright? I blame that snail for not letting me go with her._ The walls were all empty apart from the clock, the only pictures in the house were stored in that precious little album in the living room.

"It's rude to not ask your guests for snacks, Hyuuga." Natsume didn't bother to face the source, instead he ignored her and walked into the living room in search for something, _where is it?_ "Looking for this?" Natsume turned around and saw a little red book dangling from the clutches of Hotaru.

"Give it back" he demanded while holding his hand out, "don't be more annoying then you already are". Hotaru noted his tone and tossed the book onto the white 5 seater L-shaped sofa.

"Here's some advice," she said as Natsume grabbed the book from where she threw it, "don't force someone to do anything, and if you loved them you wouldn't dare hurt them either" with that she left the building like Mikan had done earlier.

 _What if you're unsure yourself, what do you do then?_

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

The streets were noisy with people running around either going home or going to work, Tokyo never looked so beautiful as it did with all the lights on, cars sped past and the streaks of light from them made my eyes light up in awe.

"Hey Sakura, want to eat some Takoyaki?" asked Ruka, his azure eyes looked hopeful at the girl as he pointed at the small shop 5 minutes from Natsume's place.

"Ruka, call me Mikan and..." I let out, I didn't want to disappoint him but I really had to get home, "I need to get home."

His lips slightly parted and his eyes lost some shine but he managed to smile and instead tugged my arm, "I'll treat you, I'm sure your parents won't mind." With that he dragged me to the shop and bought some takoyaki, he handed me one that was covered in some syrup and blew it for me, "careful, it's freshly made so it's hot".

I reluctantly nodded but ate it anyway. "So" said Ruka as he looked up at the pink sky, "what have you found out?"

"What?"

He smiled at me, "I know you went there for a reason, Mikan, I'm not stupid."

I looked down at the pavement and slowly chewed my takoyaki, "well, I found out that the three of you are childhood friends... and... he lives alone in his uncle's house ever since he was 5 but I don't know why..."

Ruka patted me on the back, "I might get hated for this but Natsume is really making no progress" he sighed, "come on Mikan, let me tell you something interesting as we go home."

 _Is this really the right thing to do?_


	30. Chapter 30: Safety

"Come on Mikan, let me tell you something interesting as we go home."

 _Is this really the right thing to do?_

* * *

The summer breeze grew chilly as we walked past stores selling trinkets along the street. The leaves were now brown like warm oak as they fell gracefully down upon the Earth, detaching themselves from their homes. Ruka was silent as he walked speedily by my side, a clear look of nervousness adorned his face, his cheeks were pale in comparison to the maroon cardigan he wrapped messily around himself.

"Hey Ruka" I called out to the blonde man who was supposed to talk to me, "are you sure you're supposed to be outside? It's just because you look a bit... sick." He looked briefly at me before stopping by a lamppost, "not that you look weird or anything, I'm just worried" I added quickly.

"I'm fine Mikan" he said coolly, unbuttoning his cardigan and wrapping it around his waist in the process, "just thinking of where to start, and if I'll still be alive to see the sunlight tomorrow" he muttered.

He gestured to a bench next to a massive tree, by the looks of it, it was the only tree with green leaves. Though the day was getting darker and the stars were beginning to become more visible, the warm light from the lamppost shining on the leaves gave me a sense of safety as the shadows casted down on the bench, the branches of the grand oak twisted into the dark sky as if its very presence was enough to slice the sky.

"Hey, stop spacing out," he waved his arm in front of my face, "I love trees too but remember that I'm here as well."

"Sorry," I replied sheepishly, "so... Continue, please."

I copied Ruka and sat down on the bench, he looked bothered as his fingers continued to fumble around. He laughed nervously as our eyes suddenly met, "I don't really know where to start" he said shyly, his smile was genuinely sweet with just the right amount of shyness that it made me smile. "Natsume has always been... Problematic." He said, his smile had faded and his eyes gave a far away look, "I remember when we were younger he flipped Imai's dress just so he could see her underwear" he chuckled at the memory, "but that was when we were 6."

I laughed too at imagining Hotaru's reaction but my chest stung slightly, _I have to ignore this feeling._

"He was a normal child, if you include looking amazingly handsome normal" he continued, "but then he was kicked out from his home was sent to his Uncle's in Tokyo, his Uncle doesn't really visit him often..." his face grew grim and once again I sensed tension from him, "I honestly don't know what happened but I vividly remember visiting him because he was missing from school to find him on the floor with bruises around his cheek."

* * *

 _(Ruka's POV)_

 _This is the right thing to do, right? Natsume told me that he was planning to tell her something so I just invited her out to see if anything happened but now I'm stuck._

Her eyes shone brightly despite the light being dim, _I guess she really is curious._

I always knew that she was something, Natsume can talk all he wants but I will never believe him when he says that she's just a fling. It was clearly obvious from the start.

* * *

 **FLASHBACK _(haven't had one of these in ages)_**

 _"Ru, how are you? I couldn't visit you today 'cause I was busy with the tournament but I'll try tomorrow."_

 _"Natsume, it's fine. How's it at school? I might join you once I get released."_

 _"It's cool, nothing interesting has happened."_

 _"What about that girl? Sakura Mikan right? I want to meet her once I get released."_

 _"..."_

 _-The person you have been calling has ended the call, please leave a message after the beep-_

 **FLASHBACK END**

* * *

 _Ah, he really acts like a kid, especially when he's jealous.  
_ _But sometimes.._

"I honestly don't know what happened but I vividly remember visiting him because he was missing from school to find him on the floor with bruises around his cheek," I told her this and her hazel eyes widened, her lips parted and all emotions disappeared from her face as well as mine.

 _It was horrendous._

* * *

 **FLASHBACK 2**

 _Wow, Natsume's new place really is 1st class, having a business man as an uncle really does pay off._

I was at the 'Jiyu Tokyo Apartment Complex' and _wow, is the floor really marble?_ _I know that I shouldn't get side-tracked but it's not everyday that a normal guy like me gets to see a neat place like this, this is complete luxury!_

 _Now, what floor is Natsume on again?_

The apartment itself was up to 50 storeys high, finding a person in a place like that was as easy as finding a needles in a haystack, or a carrot in a room full of bunnies.

 _Heh, I love bunnies.  
SHOULDN'T GET SIDE-TRACKED!_

I mentally slapped myself before dragging my body to the mahogany, polished desk in front of a giant painting by Picasso. The receptionist was young and quite a stunner, her shoes were glossy black and her uniform was ironed and pressed giving off an air of sophistication. I gave her a smile causing her cheeks to tinge pink.

 _She reminds me of Pyon back at home, I hope Mama (_ he's half French so I thought Mama was suitable) _is feeding him well._

"Welcome to Jiyu Towers, the best apartment complex in Tokyo. How may I help you sir?" Her posture was stiff and she seemed self conscious as she played around with her hair.

"I'm here to visit Korudo Hyuuga, do you know which floor he's on?" I asked the receptionist and she quickly nodded before searching on her computer, I dazed off for a while as she continued to search through the Apartment records.

 _That rose statue looks cool, I wonder how much it cost to make it._

"U-um sir?" The quiet voice a female made me snap my head around, I smiled innocently at her as she looked around nervously, "there's no-one called Korudo Hyuuga in this complex, unless you've mistaken him for Mr. Natsume Hyuuga."

 _Huh?_

"O-okay..." I replied, a little stunned at first, _I was sure that he lived here with his uncle,_ "sorry to bother you but what floor is he on? I'm a friend here to visit him."

"He's on floor 50, good day to you sir" she bowed slightly and I went on my way.

* * *

It was a quick way up, the elevator had white marble walls, a maroon carpet and no buttons, it heavily relied on technology as it worked on what the rider said. The ride up was silent apart from my humming, the doors slid shut and the elevator rose to the 50th floor without stopping. After stepping out of the elevator, I was introduced to an impressive hallway leading up to a white double door, the hallway itself was elegant, big enough to fit a glass table with 2 white chairs on either side, a potted plant stood in the corner next to the marvellous painting of a man holding an umbrella.

As I stared at the blank door in front of me I gulped slightly, there was no sound coming from behind the door or the floor in general. Just me and the inanimate objects.

 _Just knock on the door, say hi to Natsume, see if he's alright, ask him why he didn't go to school, get him to go to school then go home to Pyon. Simple._

"Okay" I breathed out and walked towards the door, I closed my fingers and tucked them in before knocking gently on the surface of the door. No answer.

"Natsume?" I called out, "Natsume? Are you in there?"

There was a dot of red on the golden handle, I touched it and realised that it was still wet.

"NATUSME? OPEN THE DOOR!" I shouted to whoever was on the other side, I pushed the door but it was solid wood and wouldn't budge, "NATUME? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?"

 _Don't tell me he got into another one._

Soon enough I heard a creek and the door was slightly open, taking my chance I pulled the handle to reveal a boy lying on the tiled floor clutching his bleeding arms and cheek. Crimson blood tinkled down from his arm and soaked his white shirt. His mangled lips looked lifeless as all life was taken from them, the blood flowed like a lazy river onto the white tiles and stained them, there were visible blood prints on the walls from where he struggled. The strong Natsume that I knew was now nothing more than a shell.

 **END OF FLASHBACK**

* * *

 _(Mikan's POV)_

"It was everywhere..." Ruka's voice cracked as he appeared traumatised by the memory, "I-I couldn't stop it, I couldn't do anything Mikan."

"Ruka..." I held his hands and wrapped an arm over his shoulder to provide some sort of comfort, "he's fine now isn't he? So let's get your mind off the past." My efforts were futile as the blonde haired man wouldn't budge and kept his head in his hands. Looking at him grew tension in my muscles as my stomach churned.

"You don't get it Mikan, he's not fine!" He shouted, passer-by's were staring at us and hurried away, but Ruka couldn't care less as his feelings continued to burst, "he's changed, Mikan, you wouldn't know it but he has."

"What's changed? What do you mean?" I asked him, his eyes widened slightly before he stood up and pulled me along, he smiled but it was painfully fake as it lacked his signature glow and innocence.

"Nothing" he answered quickly, "I'm just... Glad that he met you Mikan." His pace slowed down so we were no longer running but walking side by side, "please keep him safe."

* * *

It's been 6-ish days since I last updated.

 **S**

I was going to write 2 chapters but exams held me back. Thank GOD it's half term.


End file.
